Ransomed
by Rebecca Wade
"Hand this man over to satan, so that the sinful nature may be destroyed and his spirit saved on the day of the Lord."
1 Corinthians 5:5
Showing posts with label Marriage. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Marriage. Show all posts
5/17/12
Testimony Week: Day 4
5/16/12
Testimony Week: Day 3
Born At The Dead End
by Heather Palacios
In Robert Schuller’s biography, he began with this: “I was born at the dead end of a dirt road…” I’ll finish his sentence later.
4/18/12
Boy-Drama Begins
Just the other day...Princess #2, who is all of five years old, was not herself. We had just gotten home after church and she was huffing and puffing around like a mad woman. When I asked her what was wrong, she ran to her room. "Oh, mercy...what could have happened?!" I wondered. I mean, she can be dramatic but even so, this was a little over-the-top for her. Quickly, I followed her and when I opened the door I saw that she was sitting on her bed with her arms crossed. She wore the cutest little pouty face, with her lips pursed and her eyebrows furrowed.
4/10/12
Stepping Off the Hamster Wheel
Just the other day, my husband said these words, "I'm going to have the internet cut off for a month so we can communicate."
Ouch.
The truth hurts.
Ouch.
The truth hurts.
3/26/12
Divorce: It's Not An Option
Just the other day...I was a new bride. Our first home was quaint and colorful, filled with light, just like I had dreamed. I had taken the time to make sure every room was organized and perfect. Most of our belongings were brand new...treasures from numerous wedding showers. The lawn and yard was well-manicured, thanks to the hard work of the previous owners. And my precious husband had planted a rose garden just beyond my kitchen window as a graduation gift (we married right before I "officially" graduated from college).
Life in those days consisted of going to work and then heading to the gym afterwards. I would arrive home later and my groom and I would either cook together, or I would cook while he worked in the yard. Many days, we would eat supper on the deck and enjoy the gorgeous late afternoon sun. Then, we would roller blade, ride bikes, or walk our chocolate Labs around the neighborhood before heading in to get ready for bed.
It was the life I had always dreamed about.
In this moment, I can't tell you how far-removed I feel from that starry-eyed young bride.
As much as I would like for my life now to be that organized...
put together...
relaxed...
and pretty...
I wouldn't go back to it if I could, and I certainly wouldn't go back to my marriage then...no way!
Those first few months we had together were precious, don't get me wrong, but to be honest I wouldn't want to be the me that I was then. I wouldn't even want to be married to the "he" that he was then. Of course, I loved my him, but that love, though I didn't know it at the time, was so shallow in comparison to the love we now share...even though we were madly "in love" with each other!
The deep kind of love we now share is so much richer than anything we shared in the early days of our marriage. It's the kind of love that comes from standing beside each other through the up's and down's of life, no matter what. It's the kind of love that only comes through the testing of marital commitment, and if need be, the embracing of it for a time. In the long run, it's that kind of testing that serves to make a marriage something of true beauty.
Had I left at the first sign of any trouble, we would have missed the satisfaction that comes from fighting together and winning the battle.
Had he thrown in the towel the first moment he didn't "feel" like putting up with the old ball and chain, he would have missed the admiration and trust of a woman who feels completely secure in his arms.
Had we decided to run when the "feelings faded", our children would be suffering through all the painful experiences that come out of separation and divorce.
We've stuck it out through some pretty rough times, and the point is...we stuck!!!
It's because we made a commitment long ago...a "til death do us part" covenant before God and man. In our minds, our commitment means that the "D" word will never be tossed around. It's simply not an option in either of our minds. It's a decision that was made long before we ever walked down the aisle, and it's a decision that has helped us stay the course.
When divorce is taken out of the equation, suddenly marriage becomes the commitment it was meant to be.
It means that a couple who may have quickly turned to a lawyer for a resolution, turns instead to Almighty God for the salvation of it all. And I can assure you, God cares about the success of a marriage far more than the sum of the bride and groom put together!
One day, I will be found standing beside a man who hardly resembles the man I stood beside on that gorgeous day in April of 2001 (I hardly recognize him even now)! And one day, he will be found standing beside a similar, but very different woman. You see, as time continues to pass, the Lord continues to grow he and I both. As we have been through "stuff" and submitted to the Lord, we look more like His dream than our own.
And that's just the way it should be.
For God's dream for marriage is not that it is perfect, but that it is a living, breathing example of His unconditional, marked-by-covenant, amazing love for us!
I'm so thankful that we chose to do things God's way!! We are reaping the benefits of it today...and that, my friends, is why I would never go back to the way things were.
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10/27/11
HELP! I'm Overwhelmed!
Just the other day, I sat across the table from my dear
friend, telling her “I’m overwhelmed and I don’t even know why.” Honestly, I
just couldn’t put my finger on anything exactly. In my mind, I should be doing
just fine…but in reality, I knew that was not the case. Well, you know after
you talk about something, it’s in the forefront of your mind, so I just kept
thinking about it as I drove my little kiddos to the library, praying that God
would help me deal with all of my anxiety. And, do you know what I realized in
a God-given “aha” moment?! I realized this: I need to majorly scale back on
reading other blogs because they have given me unrealistic expectations for my
own life.
The blogosphere is made up of all kinds of unique and
wonderful people…many of whom I enjoy tremendously. However, it is rare to find
those who truly open up about their lives. Most people paint a rosy picture,
display amazing photos, and come across as all-together perfect. And then when
said “all-together perfect people” say you need to do as they do and follow
rules A, B, C, and D in order to:
- Have your husband adore you and be pleased with you
- Have the perfect marriage
- Have properly behaved, well-rounded, smart children
- Have a meticulous home that runs like a well-oiled machine
- Have the most gracious and hospitable home in the neighborhood
- Have décor like Martha Stewart and cook like Paula Deen
Um…IT GETS
OVERWHELMING AND QUITE FRANKLY, I CAN’T DO IT ALL!!!!!!!!!!!
Phew. Excuse me…I needed to just get that out:)
Seriously, I KNOW that’s not the intent of most bloggers,
but really, if you click on a lot of them, the message that comes across is just
another “YOU SHOULD”. And you know what God showed me that day…
He never put any of that on me.
I was putting it on
myself and then feeling “less than” because I couldn’t keep up with ALL OF THE STANDARDS
I took from other people.
God brings true peace into a life and into a home…nothing
else can. And He says that His yoke is easy and His burden is light. He never
puts anything on us that is overwhelming to the point of causing the kind of
anxiety I was experiencing. That stuff I was clinging to was not of Him!
In this case, I was reading too many blogs, but at other
times, I have left conversations with other people feeling like I had to DO
WHAT THEY WERE DOING in order to “do better, be better, feel better”. This trap
can happen through watching too many home remodeling shows, or reading too many
magazines/self-help books, or even by reading a status update on a social media
site where another woman declares, “I’ve done 10 loads of laundry today, baked
fresh bread, exercised for an hour, cleaned out the car, homeschooled all five
children, and made plans for a romantic dinner with my spouse this evening.” (Usually
when I read such things, I haven’t even brushed my teeth yet that day and end
up feeling lower than low.)
I asked a few of my
friends to send me some examples of what causes them to be overwhelmed. Here’s
just a glimpse of what I got back:
"I feel most overwhelmed when I have too much on my plate and
try to be super child of God, super wife, super mom, super daughter, and super friend."
"I don't feel like I'm ever enough - my house isn't pretty
enough, clean enough, up-to-date enough. I don't feel like I'm enough as a
person, either."
"It's overwhelming to me to try to do everything that I 'think' I 'should' be doing and feeling I get it all wrong... ALL the time. I
feel overwhelmed with the idea of how hard marriage is, how much work it takes
on a constant basis. I feel overwhelmed with trying to be the Godly wife that
I'm 'supposed' to be and the reality of the selfish wife that I truly am. I get
overwhelmed when I look at other women's marriages who seem to have it all
together and a 'perfect' marriage, and wonder why mine doesn't look like that
all the time?"
"I get overwhelmed when I think of all the typical 'wife' things that need to be done and I'm just so dadgum tired (and
busy) to keep up (you know... laundry... dishes... chores... grocery
shopping... meal prep... etc... etc... etc...)"
"I would say one of the biggest things that makes me most
overwhelmed is when I start thinking of how big of an impact my every single
action and word is having a HUGE impact on the future lives of my children. I
get overwhelmed at the thought that I am investing in the future generations of
my family."
Heavy stuff, huh?!
In examining my own feelings as well as those of my friends,
I realized that…one, it is sad how extremely hard we are on ourselves, and…two,
whether we realize it or not, we use other people’s lives as our measuring
stick! But, who really has a perfect marriage? Who really keeps a perfect
house? Who really has perfect kids? Who really cooks like Paula Deen and decorates like Martha Stewart? More importantly, WHO is it that makes us think that
everyone else does and then beats us down with guilt when we realize that we don’t???
It’s not God, I can tell you that.
Let me close with a story that I feel will help:
I was a new mom. My baby girl was maybe four weeks old at
the time. In preparation for becoming a mother, I had read book after book
after book about my new job and this one particular day, I was working
diligently on getting my baby girl on a schedule. Wouldn’t you know it, she
just didn’t want to cooperate with my plan! Actually, she had not cooperated in
a few days and finally, I was at my wits end. So I did what all new mommies do
in a pinch…I called my own mom. The baby was crying…I was crying…and I remember
telling my mom, “I am doing everything the book says to do and it’s just not
working!” My precious and amazingly-wise mother calmly said, “Becky, God has
given you all you need as a mother. You throw that book out the window and
listen to how HE is telling you to take care of your baby. You’ll know what to
do.” Seriously, that’s the best advice on mothering I have ever received!!! And
my mom was right on target. As soon as she said it, I knew that’s what I needed
to do and it was like she gave me validation to trust what I was hearing from
the Lord.
So ladies, here is your validation...
God has given us all that we need as a wife, mom, woman,
friend, etc. As a Christian, we have the Holy Spirit dwelling within us. Don’t
take that lightly!!! HE WANTS TO BE THE ONE TO SHOW US the path of peace in our
individual lives! We need to pay less attention to each others standards of
who we should or should not be and more attention to what HE expects…in our
homes…in our marriages…in our relationships with our kids…in every detail of
our lives. Our Father wants to show us the best way…His way! Taking the time to
listen to that still small voice He gives all of us will work, every time.
Yes, I believe God uses others as iron sharpens iron in our
lives. It’s great to be surrounded by others who challenge us. But when we use
their standards as our judge, we have set them up as an idol in our lives…period.
As a Christian, you and I must seek less to please an audience of many and more
to please an audience of ONE…the only One who can bring order and peace into our lives.
This verse out of "The Message" speaks volumes:
"Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me -- watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly." Matthew 11:28-30
May we all walk closely with you, Lord. Teach us the unforced rhythms of Your amazing grace! May we walk in Your freedom...learning daily to live freely and lightly...trusting in Your voice above every other!
_______
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6/8/11
Guard Your Heart
Just the other day, when I was a young girl in high school, I began a friendship with a guy, thinking I could “win” him to the Lord, but before long I was the one who was in trouble. Soon, I convinced myself that he and I were in love, and before I knew it, I had given my heart away. I wrote these words in my boyfriend’s yearbook: “I give you my heart” (that makes me nauseous just thinking about it). It’s not the words that sicken me as much as the thought behind the words and the very fact that I opened up my life to someone who didn’t deserve to have that honor. I allowed myself to become vulnerable to another person who could never have been my husband (“Romeo and Juliette” type of thing). I used to joke and say, “I think God will have to move me 1,000 miles away from that guy to ever get me out of this relationship.” With His impeccable sense of humor, the Lord landed me at college exactly 982 miles from my doorstep.
Sure enough, the relationship ended and both of us moved on, but the damage of three years of emotional bondage had taken its toll on my heart. I found myself comparing every other person that I tried to date with my high school boyfriend and if they didn’t measure up, it was over before it even started, so-to-speak. Thankfully, one very perceptive Christian guy came into my life and pretty much told me he wouldn’t compete and he felt it was useless to try, or for anyone to try for that matter. That’s when my eyes were opened and I finally realized, I had to let God do some heart surgery on me.
I’d like to say that emotional healing happened overnight and (POOF!) I was ready to be real and open with my heart again, but it didn’t. It was a long walk and I had a lot of feelings and baggage to deal with. I had to go through a lot of sacrificing and a lot of laying my “stuff” down.
Eventually, God got me ready and in the right place so that I could meet my husband (you can read that story here). Still, the fact that I even had to walk this road grieves me to no end. I was forced to pay a high price for not guarding my heart (my emotions/feelings) and if anyone can learn from my pain, I’d shout it from the rooftops!!! I realize that in all relationships, there is an element of risk, but for a young girl to form such an overwhelming connection was unwise and dangerous. Think about it, I was just a few years away from having played with baby dolls and pretend tea sets! Having girls now myself has helped me to realize how unprepared I was. I wish I had been taught early on the importance of guarding my heart. I wish I could have spared myself the heartache. And for those of you out there with preteen or teenage girls, I pray that you will diligently teach them to guard their hearts, for it is a precious treasure!
Sure enough, the relationship ended and both of us moved on, but the damage of three years of emotional bondage had taken its toll on my heart. I found myself comparing every other person that I tried to date with my high school boyfriend and if they didn’t measure up, it was over before it even started, so-to-speak. Thankfully, one very perceptive Christian guy came into my life and pretty much told me he wouldn’t compete and he felt it was useless to try, or for anyone to try for that matter. That’s when my eyes were opened and I finally realized, I had to let God do some heart surgery on me.
I’d like to say that emotional healing happened overnight and (POOF!) I was ready to be real and open with my heart again, but it didn’t. It was a long walk and I had a lot of feelings and baggage to deal with. I had to go through a lot of sacrificing and a lot of laying my “stuff” down.
Eventually, God got me ready and in the right place so that I could meet my husband (you can read that story here). Still, the fact that I even had to walk this road grieves me to no end. I was forced to pay a high price for not guarding my heart (my emotions/feelings) and if anyone can learn from my pain, I’d shout it from the rooftops!!! I realize that in all relationships, there is an element of risk, but for a young girl to form such an overwhelming connection was unwise and dangerous. Think about it, I was just a few years away from having played with baby dolls and pretend tea sets! Having girls now myself has helped me to realize how unprepared I was. I wish I had been taught early on the importance of guarding my heart. I wish I could have spared myself the heartache. And for those of you out there with preteen or teenage girls, I pray that you will diligently teach them to guard their hearts, for it is a precious treasure!
Even as a grown woman, I have noticed the need to continue to guard my heart. This realization has happened vicariously, mostly through others who have failed to create “safeguards” in their lives. Others may think chatting on the computer with members of the opposite sex is fine, but to me, as a married woman, it’s off limits. Others may think sending text messages or emails to another man who is “just a friend” is okay, but not me. I’ve decided not to do it unless my own husband, the other person’s spouse, or a trusted friend is in on the conversation. Others may think that flirting with their husband’s best friend or their child’s teacher is just innocent fun, but to me, it’s crossing a line. You just never know when the person you are talking to is vulnerable and furthermore, you might have a blind spot to your own weaknesses.
The Bible tells us in 1 Peter 5:8 “Be well balanced (temperate, sober of mind), be vigilant and cautious at all times; for that enemy of yours, the devil, roams around like a lion roaring [in fierce hunger], seeking someone to seize upon and devour.” His seeking is so subtle. What I might think is innocent and harmless can quickly become a recipe for the destruction of my marriage if I am not on guard. Know yourself! Guard your heart! There are too many marriages and families in ruins today because someone decided to let their guard down, someone foolishly decided they were incapable of falling, or someone decided to act selfishly in the moment.
The Bible tells us in 1 Peter 5:8 “Be well balanced (temperate, sober of mind), be vigilant and cautious at all times; for that enemy of yours, the devil, roams around like a lion roaring [in fierce hunger], seeking someone to seize upon and devour.” His seeking is so subtle. What I might think is innocent and harmless can quickly become a recipe for the destruction of my marriage if I am not on guard. Know yourself! Guard your heart! There are too many marriages and families in ruins today because someone decided to let their guard down, someone foolishly decided they were incapable of falling, or someone decided to act selfishly in the moment.
How can you guard your heart? Read on...
The easiest way to make sure you are on guard is by staying in an intimate relationship with the Lord. He is your Creator and your Father and because of that, He’s an expert in all that you need. Make sure you are filling up with Him throughout your day! Read the Bible, keep devotions open on your desktop to read when you have a pause in your day, play worship music, get alone to pray and wait on the Lord. Soak up His presence! Simply put, stay in constant communication with Him. Rely on Him, especially in those times when you know you are emotionally needy! Philippians 4: 6 – 7 says, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
Another safeguard is to make sure you are maintaining intimacy with your spouse and I’m not just talking about sexually (though that’s an important component)! Make time to connect, to really talk beyond the surface stuff like, “Honey, what’s for supper?” or “Don’t forget the kids’ game on Friday”. Schedule time together and don’t let anything get in the way of it. Make your relationship with your spouse a priority!
Lastly, make time for friends, even if you only have a moment to squeeze in a quick phone call. “A friend loves at all times” (Prov 17:17). God has given you friends as gifts! Make time to connect with them. I don’t know about your husband, but I know my husband would appreciate not having to converse about new trends in children’s clothing or the latest cute shoes;) That’s what girlfriends are for! Actually they are for much more than that, but I think you “get me” here!
~~~~~~~~
I hope I’ve encouraged you be wise in your decisions and to protect your heart/emotions! The Word of God, as always, says it best:
Above all else, guard your heart,
for everything you do flows from it.
Keep your mouth free of perversity;
keep corrupt talk far from your lips.
Let your eyes look straight ahead;
fix your gaze directly before you.
for everything you do flows from it.
Keep your mouth free of perversity;
keep corrupt talk far from your lips.
Let your eyes look straight ahead;
fix your gaze directly before you.
Give careful thought to the paths for your feet
and be steadfast in all your ways.
Do not turn to the right or the left;
keep your foot from evil.
and be steadfast in all your ways.
Do not turn to the right or the left;
keep your foot from evil.
Proverbs 4:23-27
For His glory,
4/4/11
How I Met My Husband
Just the other day, or more like ten years ago this week, I married the "one" for me and this is how we met...
My older sister had just moved to a new place and decided to join an online group for stay-at-home mom's in her area. At a play date where all of the mothers met in person, she and another lady (who is now my sister in law) started discussing their siblings. They figured out that D and I might be a good match and exchanged our pictures. That night I got a call from my sister, asking if I would consider getting to know this guy. I had just come out of a God-inspired six month "fast" from dating and was not looking for anything (in other words, I was very content). Also, the last blind date I had been on was terrible, so I was in no mood to go on another one. I told her these exact words, "You can give him my email address, but I'm not making any special trips to meet this guy" (he lived two hours away). Well, that night I received my first email from D (his sis had gone straight over to show him my pic/tell him about me) and as they say...the rest is history! We emailed daily for about two weeks, and then I decided to let him call me. After talking on the phone for about a week, we decided to actually meet in person.
Our first date was on Feb 11, 2000. We met in the parking lot of a Cracker Barrel about an hour from me because it was the half-way point. I remember him getting out of his SUV, lookin' all cute in a blue collared shirt and khaki pants (insert smile). It was a good first impression (although I had seen his pic that my sis had sent me through snail-mail). He opened the car door for me to get in. He asked me the same question twice in just a few minutes, so I could tell he was nervous, but I thought it was just adorable. He was really trying! We drove to a larger city nearer to where he lived and decided to eat at Joe's Crab Shack. I had suggested it, but with a motive. I thought that if we had absolutely nothing to talk about I could try to start a conversation based on some of the crazy stuff they usually have displayed in those restaurants (lame, I know)! I don't remember much about the restaurant, but I do remember that we signed our names right beside our booth. (Why would we do that if we didn't think something "special" was going on?! Hmmmmm.)
After we ate, D took me ice skating. He was the Minister of Students at a church and had recently taken some children there for an outing, so he thought it would be fun. It was! We skated around and talked for the longest time. My favorite part of this story happened at that skating rink. For some reason, D made the remark that he never fell when he was skating. I promise you not thirty seconds later, he fell down for no apparent reason!!! Oh my soul, looking back that is so funny!!!! Don't worry, nothing was hurt but his pride (insert smile with a wink).
We ended the night at a coffee shop where neither one of us drank coffee, but we just got some dessert and talked some more. The "it" moment for me, the moment that got me hooked (ok, besides some pretty good flirting), was on the drive back to my car as the night was coming to a close. We got into a really deep conversation (remember we had already been "talking" for a few weeks through email and on the phone) about what we wanted life to look like for us...as individuals, mind you...in the future. I remember D saying something like "Sure, I want children and I will love my children, no doubt...but whoever my wife is....ultimately, I will CHOOSE her. I want to love her first and put her first, before the kids, because I chose her and I will choose to love her for the rest of my life. Each night, when my kids go to bed, I just want to enjoy hanging out with my wife. I always want her to know that she is special." Now, that may not sound amazingly romantic to anyone else, but to me at that time, he painted a picture that I wanted to be in! He kinda was also saying (in not so many words), "I know what I want and I'm not playing games here" which was good to know, cause I was DONE playing games (can I get an AMEN from all my sista's who are still "in waiting" out there?! There's hope...hang in there!). Well, to try and make this long story shorter, guess what?! He chose me and he still chooses me and I am living in the picture he painted that night.........how sweet it is:)
I literally felt like I drove that hour back to my home on a cloud. I am not kidding you, it just felt like I floated home (I know, "gag me"...but it's true). I just remember praying and smiling and thinking about the night and praying and smiling and........floating.
And that's the story of how we met.
Now you know:)
P.s. I ended up making LOTS and LOTS of "special trips" just to see "that guy". We lived two hours apart, but we ended up seeing each other every weekend for the next 14 months (except for one when he went on a ten day mission trip).
My older sister had just moved to a new place and decided to join an online group for stay-at-home mom's in her area. At a play date where all of the mothers met in person, she and another lady (who is now my sister in law) started discussing their siblings. They figured out that D and I might be a good match and exchanged our pictures. That night I got a call from my sister, asking if I would consider getting to know this guy. I had just come out of a God-inspired six month "fast" from dating and was not looking for anything (in other words, I was very content). Also, the last blind date I had been on was terrible, so I was in no mood to go on another one. I told her these exact words, "You can give him my email address, but I'm not making any special trips to meet this guy" (he lived two hours away). Well, that night I received my first email from D (his sis had gone straight over to show him my pic/tell him about me) and as they say...the rest is history! We emailed daily for about two weeks, and then I decided to let him call me. After talking on the phone for about a week, we decided to actually meet in person.
Our first date was on Feb 11, 2000. We met in the parking lot of a Cracker Barrel about an hour from me because it was the half-way point. I remember him getting out of his SUV, lookin' all cute in a blue collared shirt and khaki pants (insert smile). It was a good first impression (although I had seen his pic that my sis had sent me through snail-mail). He opened the car door for me to get in. He asked me the same question twice in just a few minutes, so I could tell he was nervous, but I thought it was just adorable. He was really trying! We drove to a larger city nearer to where he lived and decided to eat at Joe's Crab Shack. I had suggested it, but with a motive. I thought that if we had absolutely nothing to talk about I could try to start a conversation based on some of the crazy stuff they usually have displayed in those restaurants (lame, I know)! I don't remember much about the restaurant, but I do remember that we signed our names right beside our booth. (Why would we do that if we didn't think something "special" was going on?! Hmmmmm.)
After we ate, D took me ice skating. He was the Minister of Students at a church and had recently taken some children there for an outing, so he thought it would be fun. It was! We skated around and talked for the longest time. My favorite part of this story happened at that skating rink. For some reason, D made the remark that he never fell when he was skating. I promise you not thirty seconds later, he fell down for no apparent reason!!! Oh my soul, looking back that is so funny!!!! Don't worry, nothing was hurt but his pride (insert smile with a wink).
We ended the night at a coffee shop where neither one of us drank coffee, but we just got some dessert and talked some more. The "it" moment for me, the moment that got me hooked (ok, besides some pretty good flirting), was on the drive back to my car as the night was coming to a close. We got into a really deep conversation (remember we had already been "talking" for a few weeks through email and on the phone) about what we wanted life to look like for us...as individuals, mind you...in the future. I remember D saying something like "Sure, I want children and I will love my children, no doubt...but whoever my wife is....ultimately, I will CHOOSE her. I want to love her first and put her first, before the kids, because I chose her and I will choose to love her for the rest of my life. Each night, when my kids go to bed, I just want to enjoy hanging out with my wife. I always want her to know that she is special." Now, that may not sound amazingly romantic to anyone else, but to me at that time, he painted a picture that I wanted to be in! He kinda was also saying (in not so many words), "I know what I want and I'm not playing games here" which was good to know, cause I was DONE playing games (can I get an AMEN from all my sista's who are still "in waiting" out there?! There's hope...hang in there!). Well, to try and make this long story shorter, guess what?! He chose me and he still chooses me and I am living in the picture he painted that night.........how sweet it is:)
I literally felt like I drove that hour back to my home on a cloud. I am not kidding you, it just felt like I floated home (I know, "gag me"...but it's true). I just remember praying and smiling and thinking about the night and praying and smiling and........floating.
And that's the story of how we met.
Now you know:)
P.s. I ended up making LOTS and LOTS of "special trips" just to see "that guy". We lived two hours apart, but we ended up seeing each other every weekend for the next 14 months (except for one when he went on a ten day mission trip).
1/4/09
Looking Both Ways
A Look Back:
In retrospect, 2008 was a good year. I definitely learned and grew as a person. It's certainly true that growth does not occur without some amount of testing and hardship. I will not elaborate on the difficulties, but suffice it to say that I'll take all the wonderful-good with the yucky-bad if in some way it brings glory to the One who matters most! So, here goes -- a very short list of some of the "big" things God taught me in 2008.
1-"Do It Afraid"...simply put, don't be afraid to fail, be afraid of the failure that comes in never taking the risk! I've missed out on a lot in life due to fear. No more.
2-Stay focused on eternity...I think it was Rick Warren who said that this life is just practice for the next, which will be our REAL "life". So true! We have one chance and one chance only to spend THIS life doing that which matters most. It would do us all some good to take inventory and make sure our focus is dead on! (I also read "90 Minutes in Heaven"...got me super-pumped about the life ahead in a way I have not been since...well, probably since I accepted the Lord as my Savior!)
3-"Getting It"...I never will...LOL! Seriously, life is a journey and we aren't meant to know it all! That's helps us to stay dependent on God who will lead us day-by-day. He'll supply us with snippets of truth, but not the whole tamale!
4-Motherhood (lesson revisited each year since 2004)...This mommy-thing is both the most frustrating AND the most fulfilling job all at the SAME time. I'm still learning to let go of the housework and the "to do" list in order to focus on what's most important. Some days, my house is a wreck and I simply can't stay on top of it...but my kids are happy and KNOW they are loved and accepted. I'm not superwoman; I'm a work in progress.
5-It's all God's...ALL of it. He is my provider. End of story.
6-Prince Charming is a myth...I LOVE my husband and he is my best friend, but man did I put him on a pedestal! He is not God. He will never fulfill all of my needs. Whoever fed us this lie that a man will be "it" for us?! Did you read what I wrote above. He's not God. And, neither is your husband (wonderful as he may be!). I will teach my girls this great lesson.
7-LOVE...God LOVES me. Period. I can't add anything to my life to make Him love me more. He taught me this one night in prayer. It rocked my world. I cried like a baby for about an hour. I changed that night. Somehow, this truth moved from head-knowledge to heart-knowledge in an instant. What can I say...He's God and He can do that! I pray that He'll do that for you if you don't grasp what I'm talking about here. Oh man do I pray He'll do that for you!
8-That I never, ever, ever want to have as busy of a Christmas season as I experienced this year! My usual Christmas "joy" never showed up on the doorstep of my heart. That fact brings me utter sadness, especially since it is my favorite holiday. I don't know what I did wrong...but when I figure it out, it won't happen again.
Looking Ahead:
I am greatly anticipating all that God has in store for 2009 because I just KNOW He's gonna blow my socks off! Why? Well (A) -- He never leaves any of us where we are if we stay yielded to Him (Conversely, He is certainly a "gentleman" and will stay away, so-to-speak, if we kick and scream and declare that we have no real need of Him...which is a sad way to live, but haven't we all done it either in our words or actions?!) and (B) -- 'Cause He gave me a super-cool verse for my year. Now, I can't take credit for the "verse for the year" because I actually got the idea at www.marybethwhalen.com (and I don't know how to put a link in, sad but true). Anyhow, when I read the idea though, I thought it was so neat. So, I asked and He gave. Are you ready for it? It is Ephesians 3:20-21:
"Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen." (New King James Version)
Oh man, I could totally write a whole blog about the verse (and probably should cause this is so long!) but let me just say...
He is SO able
to do
exceedingly abundantly
above (or BEYOND)
all that I ask or (even) think!
Wooooooooooooooo! Does that not give you goosebumps?????! Cause I don't know about you, but I'm ready for Him to move big-time in my life, in my family, in my church, and in my world! And you know what...He will. I know He will. Sure, bumps in the road and challenges will come, but doesn't that make life all-the-more interesting and WORTH IT when the end result is something beautiful?! I believe it does.
So 2009, I love you already...for the promise you hold because of the One who already sees you from beginning to end and is SO ABLE to do great things! Bring it on!
In retrospect, 2008 was a good year. I definitely learned and grew as a person. It's certainly true that growth does not occur without some amount of testing and hardship. I will not elaborate on the difficulties, but suffice it to say that I'll take all the wonderful-good with the yucky-bad if in some way it brings glory to the One who matters most! So, here goes -- a very short list of some of the "big" things God taught me in 2008.
1-"Do It Afraid"...simply put, don't be afraid to fail, be afraid of the failure that comes in never taking the risk! I've missed out on a lot in life due to fear. No more.
2-Stay focused on eternity...I think it was Rick Warren who said that this life is just practice for the next, which will be our REAL "life". So true! We have one chance and one chance only to spend THIS life doing that which matters most. It would do us all some good to take inventory and make sure our focus is dead on! (I also read "90 Minutes in Heaven"...got me super-pumped about the life ahead in a way I have not been since...well, probably since I accepted the Lord as my Savior!)
3-"Getting It"...I never will...LOL! Seriously, life is a journey and we aren't meant to know it all! That's helps us to stay dependent on God who will lead us day-by-day. He'll supply us with snippets of truth, but not the whole tamale!
4-Motherhood (lesson revisited each year since 2004)...This mommy-thing is both the most frustrating AND the most fulfilling job all at the SAME time. I'm still learning to let go of the housework and the "to do" list in order to focus on what's most important. Some days, my house is a wreck and I simply can't stay on top of it...but my kids are happy and KNOW they are loved and accepted. I'm not superwoman; I'm a work in progress.
5-It's all God's...ALL of it. He is my provider. End of story.
6-Prince Charming is a myth...I LOVE my husband and he is my best friend, but man did I put him on a pedestal! He is not God. He will never fulfill all of my needs. Whoever fed us this lie that a man will be "it" for us?! Did you read what I wrote above. He's not God. And, neither is your husband (wonderful as he may be!). I will teach my girls this great lesson.
7-LOVE...God LOVES me. Period. I can't add anything to my life to make Him love me more. He taught me this one night in prayer. It rocked my world. I cried like a baby for about an hour. I changed that night. Somehow, this truth moved from head-knowledge to heart-knowledge in an instant. What can I say...He's God and He can do that! I pray that He'll do that for you if you don't grasp what I'm talking about here. Oh man do I pray He'll do that for you!
8-That I never, ever, ever want to have as busy of a Christmas season as I experienced this year! My usual Christmas "joy" never showed up on the doorstep of my heart. That fact brings me utter sadness, especially since it is my favorite holiday. I don't know what I did wrong...but when I figure it out, it won't happen again.
Looking Ahead:
I am greatly anticipating all that God has in store for 2009 because I just KNOW He's gonna blow my socks off! Why? Well (A) -- He never leaves any of us where we are if we stay yielded to Him (Conversely, He is certainly a "gentleman" and will stay away, so-to-speak, if we kick and scream and declare that we have no real need of Him...which is a sad way to live, but haven't we all done it either in our words or actions?!) and (B) -- 'Cause He gave me a super-cool verse for my year. Now, I can't take credit for the "verse for the year" because I actually got the idea at www.marybethwhalen.com (and I don't know how to put a link in, sad but true). Anyhow, when I read the idea though, I thought it was so neat. So, I asked and He gave. Are you ready for it? It is Ephesians 3:20-21:
"Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen." (New King James Version)
Oh man, I could totally write a whole blog about the verse (and probably should cause this is so long!) but let me just say...
He is SO able
to do
exceedingly abundantly
above (or BEYOND)
all that I ask or (even) think!
Wooooooooooooooo! Does that not give you goosebumps?????! Cause I don't know about you, but I'm ready for Him to move big-time in my life, in my family, in my church, and in my world! And you know what...He will. I know He will. Sure, bumps in the road and challenges will come, but doesn't that make life all-the-more interesting and WORTH IT when the end result is something beautiful?! I believe it does.
So 2009, I love you already...for the promise you hold because of the One who already sees you from beginning to end and is SO ABLE to do great things! Bring it on!
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