tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-47068873140156663172024-03-13T14:48:56.082-04:00Becky Lee Meetze(recalling the past to inspire the future)Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.comBlogger158125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4706887314015666317.post-51844138200713681942017-02-06T09:22:00.000-05:002017-02-06T09:22:31.843-05:00When Words Mean More<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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2017. For me, it has come in like a hushed whisper and continued like a gentle breeze. Life has been quiet and peaceful the past few weeks. I've found myself with time to be still...time to take inventory...time to evaluate and think about what really matters. I've prayed a lot. I've spent quality time with my family. I've had time to sit and read without feeling hurried. It has been absolutely wonderful and so very refreshing, but at the same time...<br />
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<i><b>...very unsettling!</b></i><br />
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Doesn't that sound ridiculous?! How can such a refreshing time be so unsettling?<br />
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It can be unsettling when you haven't known true rest for a very, very long time. It can be unsettling when you start to feel that life with an absence of busyness means God has side-lined you and said, "Thanks for the effort, darlin', but you're done now." Honestly, that's how I was starting to feel until one day I decided to sit with the Lord and ask Him about this season.<br />
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"Lord, what are You up to here? My life is so very quiet and uneventful. Have I done something wrong?"<br />
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His answer was a passage of scripture I have read hundreds and hundreds of times. The words danced lovingly off the pages of my Bible and settled into my heart like a fresh-fallen snow. I read a love letter from the only One who understands just what turmoil I have faced the last few years. This battered heart has needed some rest and so these words were a soothing, healing balm...<br />
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<b>"The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.</b><br />
<b>He makes me lie down in green pastures,</b><br />
<b>he leads me beside quiet waters,</b><br />
<b>he restores my soul.</b><br />
<b>He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake.</b><br />
<b>Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,</b><br />
<b>I will fear no evil,</b><br />
<b>for you are with me;</b><br />
<b>your rod and your staff,</b><br />
<b>they comfort me.</b><br />
<b>You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies.</b><br />
<b>You anoint my head with oil;</b><br />
<b>my cup overflows.</b><br />
<b>Surely goodness and love with follow me all the days of my life,</b><br />
<b>and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever."</b><br />
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What words of love! Wow...a season of restoration after a long, weary battle. A Shepherd who takes care of me, providing all of my needs. Even more, a Shepherd who sees beyond the physical into the spiritual, knowing that green pastures and quiet waters are what's needed most. It is HE who restores my soul! He makes me lie down. He takes me into quiet places. He gently leads me this way, calming every fear and quieting my heart. Even if I be taken through the "valley of the shadow of death," it's ok, for there I will still know that it is He who walks with me...guiding me, disciplining me, comforting me. Though there be critics and naysayers and those who wound and hurt, He still lovingly prepares a table of good in front of me. He knows my heart. The other "voices" don't matter to Him. He anoints my head. Knowing how undeserving I am, I am humbly aware that my cup overflows. I am overwhelmed that my Shepherd would take notice of me and love me to such depths. My heart rejoices, knowing that this kind of goodness and this amazing love will be with me...pursuing me....all the days of my life. To dwell with Him, in His house forever, will one day be my souls deepest delight!!<br />
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Reading Psalm 23 changed everything. I'll never read it the same again. It means more having walked through some of the most difficult days of my life.<br />
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I'm finally on the other side and here in this season, my Father says rest...heal...be still...trust.<br />
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Instead of questioning, I'll gladly obey.<br />
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photo credit: Jayembee69 <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/93448689@N02/30694791526">A view from East Worldham</a> via <a href="http://photopin.com/">photopin</a> <a href="https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/2.0/">(license)</a></div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4706887314015666317.post-6869572860918080832016-12-23T12:31:00.000-05:002016-12-23T13:45:21.960-05:00Chasing Christmas<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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December is overwhelming. I started off the month with a speaking engagement followed by back-to-back parties at our house. I was so sure life would slow down for us then. I would be able to merely relax for the rest of the month, enjoying all the wonder of the season. <br />
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But, I have been chasing Christmas since Dec 1st.<br />
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My disappointment came to a head when I was frantically cleaning up one day, realizing my kids had played a game of paper airplanes, flying their creations from high above in our loft area straight down to our foyer. Bending over to pick up one of the airplanes, I realized it had landed in front of my grandmother's china cabinet and I paused there.<br />
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Running my hand over the worn corners, I thought of her. I imagined coming in out of the cold into her very warm gas-heated home, slamming her creaky door behind me. I thought of her Christmas tree smothered from top to bottom in silver, stringy icicles. When I was a child, she'd let me throw those onto it in handfuls and never say a word. I thought of how, every Christmas, I would plunder through her old 8-track tapes to find a treasure..."Christmas with the Chipmunks". Alvin, Simon, and Theodore would belt out Christmas classics and I would dance and laugh and sing right along with them. I thought about that old piece of furniture and how along with her china, it once held hundreds of black and white photos. She would sit with me for hours, going through each one, telling me about family members. The most treasured ones were of my grandfather who left for Heaven when I was just 4 years old. He was the one I wanted to hear about the most.<br />
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Flooded with memories, I opened every drawer, every single drawer, trying desperately to capture a certain smell that hits me sometimes when I open them. You see, it's the smell of my childhood...the smell of warmth and love and happiness...and yes, even Christmases gone by. I've been so busy, I needed to feel <i><b>that</b></i> and hold onto that brief connection to the past...even if just for a moment.<br />
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But I couldn't find it. With a tear trickling down my face, staring into the den at my own Christmas tree, I mourned my loss of a peaceful, warm and fuzzy Christmas. Maybe this year I was not going to "feel" Christmas and just about as quickly as that thought crossed my mind, so did another...<br />
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<span style="font-size: medium;"><b>Christmas is not a feeling at all.</b></span><br />
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The movies tell us it is. The commercials do as well. Every Hallmark movie with every sappy, happy ending that we swoon over is fake and while we love it for transporting us to "good feelings" we also fall for the lie that our life must match up to be worthwhile, especially this time of year! We end up believing that Christmas IS in fact all about warm, fuzzy feelings and sweet tender moments and joyous, happy children whose eyes twinkle with delight. If that doesn't happen...if this picture inside our head escapes us...then we are conned into being let down.<br />
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But, can I ask you, how in the world can we ever be let down over the most wondrous gift ever given...the gift of our Emmanuel...our "God with us" who stepped out of Heaven to live among us?<br />
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His awesome birth IS our focus, whether we have all the sappy feelings or not!<br />
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And, speaking of Jesus, can we just focus on his mom for a minute, here?<br />
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There's a verse in Luke that says, "but Mary kept all these things and pondered them in her heart." As a mom, I have always connected to those words. Practically every mother who has ever lived has stared into the face of her child and wondered who they might become, dreaming of their bright future. Even more so, Mary, who had been visited by an angel and told of her baby's holy purpose! And yet, I think of her also at the foot of the cross a mere 33 years later, watching her beloved child die the most gruesome death imaginable. On that day, her feelings most certainly would not have matched the joyous moment when Jesus' birth was foretold. And, I'm guessing that Mary may have continued to ponder the great mystery of it all, for it is a great mystery! Wasn't her child supposed to become the King?<br />
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It is safe to say, God's ways and our ways do not match up and very often, do not make sense. There are truths we know in our hearts that we do not feel, but abide by because we believe. We are called as His children to obey, to be faithful, and to carry on, NOT because we "feel it", but because we believe it!!<br />
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And so I am determined to not just let my feelings off the hook this Christmas, but to kick them to the curb! I choose to celebrate Christ and Christ alone...not the presents, not the family time, not the decorations, not the memories of Christmases past, not the Christmas-y <b>feelings</b> in any way, shape, or form....no, I choose to celebrate the birth of a Savior who came to die so that I might live!<br />
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He is all the reason I need to realize that this is, in fact, a very merry Christmas, no matter how I feel. </div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4706887314015666317.post-88871009840954342762016-08-29T08:50:00.000-04:002016-08-29T08:50:37.744-04:00Anything Changes Everything<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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I like to sleep and sleep likes me. Once I'm out, I'm usually out for the night, and waking me is about like waking the dead. Mornings generally bring on a kind of sleep-induced hangover, causing me to need to slowly ease into my day (something my husband teases me about endlessly). I have been this way for as long as I can remember.<br />
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For this reason, if I ever suddenly jolt out of a deep sleep and am wide awake in the middle of the night, I suspect that it has to be the Lord. After praying for whoever He brings to mind, I might fall back to sleep, but if the Lord is<i> really trying </i>to get my attention, well...sleep is over! In those times, I get up, grab my Bible, pray, and try to listen to that "still, small voice". It never fails. He always has something important to say.<br />
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Last year, He had something important to say. It was just before 5am, and sure enough, I was aroused out of a deep sleep. Being that it was our last day on vacation, I honestly tried hard to ignore the urgency thinking I needed the extra rest for packing up and heading home, but the sense that I needed to get up was very strong. I put on some clothes, tiptoed out of the room, and was quiet as a mouse as I opened the beach house door.<br />
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I had never seen the sunrise over the ocean, so I figured if I was up, I would go spend time with the Lord on the beach. This particular morning, it seems, God had both a sunrise and a word that He didn't want me to miss.<br />
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I had no idea what time the sun would actually come up. Using the flashlight on my cell phone, I made my way down the little path out to the ocean. I was somewhat leery walking through the bushes and the shadows, but I reached the boardwalk soon enough.<br />
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Stopping to take a few pictures of the moon and stars in the faint light, I noticed a bench overlooking the ocean, so I sat down and slowly took in the salty air. I savored the cool breeze, thinking about how hot it would be in just a few hours. Looking around, I realized quickly that I was all alone. It was just me, the Lord, and the sound of the ocean waves rolling in. I knew right away that this was, indeed, a divine appointment.<br />
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There are only a handful of times in my life that I can say I have sensed such an undeniable, weighty, and overwhelming presence of the Lord. In the stillness of that moment, it sat heavy on me, blanketing me in the most amazing peace. It's almost like God was waiting for me on the beach that morning. It was surprising, unexpected, and caught me completely off guard, in the very best way possible.<br />
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Sitting in awe and reverence, I didn't say a word, but I felt both completely known and completely loved all at the same time. I also felt extremely vulnerable. Before I knew it, a slow trickle of tears cascaded down each cheek. Emotions from somewhere down deep soon turned into sobs that I couldn't control. It was evident that I had been carrying a burden for far too long, because it gushed out of me as the Lord's presence scratched the surface of a painful wound. That morning, alone on the beach, I couldn't hide behind busyness or distraction or complacency. He had removed all of those. He stripped away my every defense, engulfed me in His love, and feeling completely safe.... I..... let ..... go.<br />
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You see, for a few years, I had been fighting to fit in...to feel like I belonged in a place that was way too big and way too cold. The saying "bloom where you're planted" had played over and over in my mind, so, like a good soldier, I marched on. I kept my nose to the grindstone, knowing that God saw my motives and that He would honor them. Yet, every act of bravery to put myself out there ended in failure and I had basically thrown in the towel. I had not fit in from the moment I arrived, and I never would. It was one of the most utterly confusing times in my life and honestly, I was starting to doubt that the Lord had taken notice of any of it. In fact, it seemed like it was open season on me in many areas of my life. I felt like I was dying on the inside and no one knew it.<br />
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But God.<br />
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The One who woke me up and arranged one of the most beautiful moments of my entire life...He saw it all. And He cared. Deeply. Until that moment on the beach, I don't think I knew how much.<br />
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I held nothing back. All of the pain, confusion, and hurt came out. I confessed that I felt like one gigantic disappointment and then I prayed what I now understand is a very dangerous prayer. I told God, with every ounce of sincerity in me, that I surrendered to anything...anything that I needed to do...anything that I needed to say...anything that needed to be moved, switched up, laid down, let go, given away, or completely removed from my life...I was ready, for anything.<br />
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<b>Anything.</b><br />
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As I sat quietly before the Lord after that, inhaling and exhaling, having poured out my heart to Him for quite a long time, I witnessed the most glorious sunrise I had ever seen! I started crying all over again, thanking Him repeatedly for such a magnificent sight. In the stillness, I felt like the Lord gently spoke these words to me, words I wrote down so that I would never forget them. I share them here, because maybe, just maybe, one of you needs to hear them as well...........<br />
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<i>"You're a dreamer and that's no mistake. You feel deeply by design...just like I designed the sunrise you saw today. My love is powerful and constant. It's like the waves that change the shape of the shoreline according to My will. It is my masterpiece. So are you. It's okay not to fit in. It's okay to rest and not know the next step. It's okay to not 'feel' used by me. I make no mistakes. To say you are a disappointment would be to say that I have made a mistake. I make no mistakes. My love for you is powerful and constant. It will change you. Let it. Daily."</i><br />
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That morning, a different woman walked off the beach. My burdens were lifted. I had been profoundly changed in the presence of God.<br />
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Six weeks later, our world started to turn upside down in many ways, and while I can't tell you it was easy, I can tell you this...it was worth it!! <b>My prayer of "anything" changed EVERYTHING.</b> God literally moved us to a new city, put us in a new church, moved us into a new house, and even gave us a new-to-us vehicle. Nothing is the same, <i>but all of it is better than we could have ever imagined!</i> My life is far removed from every thought, feeling, or concern that I had that morning on the beach and <b>I will be forever grateful that God woke me up</b>.<br />
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_________________________________<br />
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My prayer for you today is this...that you would get alone with God and pour out your heart to Him like never before. Maybe He broke through the noise and distraction in my life that morning and woke me up so that He could, on this day, <b>wake you up</b>! He loves you!! You are not a mistake. You are not a disappointment. You are His masterpiece!!! And if you're brave enough to pray a dangerous prayer of surrender....to say to Him, "anything"...I promise, He will be faithful to come through on your behalf, both for your good and for His glory! <b>Anything changes everything!! </b></div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4706887314015666317.post-71825556703605018162016-07-20T13:30:00.000-04:002016-07-20T13:30:28.305-04:00A Time to Shine<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Our world. Broken. So broken.<br />
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It's hard to believe all that's taking place right now. For those of us who run towards righteousness and goodness, who believe that God's original intent was for this to be a place of love and warmth...the sheer evil rearing its head right now is hardly digestible. It's almost as if our worst nightmares are coming true right before our eyes. It's happening so fast, too! Terrible, horrific headlines seem to bombard us day after day. </div>
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At the tender age of 8, I was at my church watching a low budget and badly-made film on the End Times, when God and eternity became very, very real. Seeing the reality of a world gone mad and a world without Christ play out on that screen, well, it pierced my heart like no sermon ever had. Suddenly, I faced the questions of "what if"...what if God was real? What if He truly IS the only way to Heaven? What if He returns and I am not ready? It was that very night, alone in my room, tiny tears staining my pillow, that I gave my life to Christ and committed to live for Him. He changed me in an instant and I knew it...even at the age of 8. </div>
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Jesus talked about the days just before He comes...what they might look like and how those of us who were watching could recognize the signs. If you know His Word, it doesn't take much to realize that things are lining up right now, right before our eyes. Wars. Deception. Calling evil, good, and good, evil. The love of many growing cold. His gospel now being spread across the entire world through computers, cell phones, and airplanes taking missionaries to the uttermost parts of the earth. It is all lining up. </div>
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And for believers and the church, what does this mean?</div>
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It simply means this...</div>
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I believe that very soon...even now...the darkness of this place is going to awaken within humanity the same questions that were awakened in a little 8 year old girl so many years ago. "What if" is going to be on the minds and hearts of people all across this world. Your neighbors will be quietly questioning. Your friends will be seeking answers. Your family members will strike up conversations. Heaven and Hell will not be myths as good vs. evil takes center stage. As a Christ-follower, it will be a time for you to speak the Truth like never before! YOUR testimony of what God has done in YOUR life matters immensely and will matter greatly in the days to come.<br />
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The Father promised us that in the last days, there will be a great revival and a great harvest. It will be a time when He will pour out of His Spirit upon all flesh. It will be a time when multitudes turn to Him and place their hope in Him as their Savior. How exciting is that?!!?! If that is what is upon us, then it is certainly <b>not</b> a time to shrink back and hide! No. <i><b>It's a time for your walk and your witness to shine ever so brightly!!</b></i> Please, please don't let the headlines scare you into silence (remember fear is the opposite of faith). Don't let the opposition cause you to hide. You know the Truth and the Truth has set you free. Offer that freedom to everyone who will listen!! Love your neighbor...no matter what their skin color or nationality...as you love yourself. And know this, the Lord has positioned you, right where you are, to point others to Him. Do your job and do it well.<br />
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Work as if the entire harvest depends on YOU!!<br />
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Can you imagine if we all did that?<br />
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______________________________<br />
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photo credit: Camden Little </div>
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Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4706887314015666317.post-21640316540615673612016-07-05T09:57:00.000-04:002016-07-05T09:57:48.756-04:00Writing Again<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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The past few years have proven to be a training ground for me. What I thought I knew about the Lord has only been enhanced and enlightened. Truths about the Lord had to be settled in my heart. I have written sporadically or not at all over this time because, quite frankly, I was wrestling and searching. Trust me, friends, God was doing a deep and sacred work in my heart. I believe the lessons I have learned and more specifically, a greater understanding of what it means to be broken, will anchor me for the rest of my days.<br />
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I needed, very much, to step away...to evaluate...reevaluate again...and come to a greater acceptance that this writing and speaking thing is so very <i>not about me</i>. Do you know how I discovered that? I laid it down and then, I tried very hard to walk away. But walking away from one's giftings, I have found, might just be some of the hardest work of all. It is quite difficult to get very far! And God? He is persistent. I bawled earlier this year in front of an entire group of strangers as one of them spoke to this gift and affirmed what God was already whispering to me. My Father doesn't let go, and I love Him to pieces for it!<br />
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The Spirit of the Lord is passionate about reaching others through any and all means possible. When He gives us a gift, He intends for it to be used. He decides the seasons in which our gifts are used and the ways in which we are to use them, and it is our job to obey. After much prayer, I can tell you this without a doubt, His decision for me is not to walk away and not to shut it down, but to pick it back up and to continue what was started. I no longer see this as something I'm "dabbling" in. Not at all.<br />
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<b>It is my calling. </b><br />
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In obedience to the Lord, I have had this blog redesigned in a simple and straightforward way, with just my name, a few headings, and words on the page. I enter back into this online space, tiptoeing quietly to my keyboard, knowing there are things the Lord intends to do here, but in reverence, awe, and fear of Him like never before. I pray desperately that He uses my "voice" however He sees fit. I long with every ounce of my heart to honor God, to obediently follow, and then to leave the consequences up to His discretion.<br />
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You can expect nothing more and nothing less than what I feel inspired to say in this space. I won't promise any kind of frequency at this point except this...I will meet with you here much more than I have in the past couple of years. I will pour out my heart. I will not be afraid. I will not run. I will write and speak as He opens the doors simply because of this...<br />
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He has asked me to pick it up one more time.<br />
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So here I am, my friends, surrendering.<br />
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photo credit: <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/45854097@N00/26150858841">Maquina d'escriure</a> via <a href="http://photopin.com/">photopin</a> <a href="https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.0/">(license)</a></div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4706887314015666317.post-45554131434667315112015-08-04T09:22:00.000-04:002016-06-09T22:11:16.371-04:00Born For Such A Time<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<br />
Just the other day...I was a young sophomore in high school. I was asked to write a paper on a controversial topic and I chose the subject of abortion. My parents suggested I visit some friends of theirs who ran a crisis pregnancy center in order to gather information. There, I met one of most humble and devoted Christian couples I had ever come across in my life. They armed me with videos and testimonies and loads of information. My love of the unborn and pro-life views were solidified during that time, so much so that even as a teen, I ended up volunteering at that same crisis pregnancy center for the next two years...conducting free pregnancy tests, preparing gift baskets for new moms, and even counseling young girls on the value of the new life growing inside them.<br />
<br />
One story that I would share behind closed doors at that crisis pregnancy center is one that I rarely share with anyone today. Why? Well, you'll hear. It sounds a little too pompous (as in tooting my own horn) and supernatural for most people. You see I grew up in a church where it was normal for God to speak through prophetic messages, for Him to heal miraculously, and for Him to be as real and as close to the believer as the air in the room. I am now by divine design the wife of the Southern Baptist minister and typically, our denomination as a whole focuses much less on the working of God through the Holy Spirit than the denomination I was raised in. No matter what I've seen the Lord do in the past or what I know about how He can move through the power of the Holy Spirit, the church as a whole is not very comfortable with much of what I grew up understanding. In other words, I can't unsee what I have seen and unknow what I have known. It is my history. I have filtered through the teachings of both denominations, probably studying a little more than I ever would have because of it. Have I completely abandoned those early beliefs? No, but I just don't talk about it among people who don't have my same background. Trying to explain the power of the Holy Spirit working in such ways is like trying to explain the colors of the rainbow to a blind man. It is rather impossible until eyes that long to see, ask to be opened.<br />
<br />
Wow, that was a very long and drawn out way to say...this is going to sound crazy to some of you, but nonetheless, it's a true story. Ask my mom. I'm sharing it to prove a point, so hang in there!<br />
<br />
My mother was in the parking lot of our church one day in 1976 when the pastor's wife walked up to her and said that the Lord had a message for her. The message was this, that He was answering her prayers for another little girl! My mom was elated, because she had always prayed in faith for God to give her two boys and two girls. She had her boys and one little girl already, but still desperately wanted one more daughter, so she never stopped praying.<br />
<br />
Not long after that, my mom went to a women's Bible study/prayer time. She had told no one about the message that had been given to her just days before, but during that meeting, another one of her friends prayed with her. That friend also felt impressed by God to share with my mom that she would have another daughter, one who would "bring joy to she and my dad in their latter years".<br />
<br />
Well sure enough, a blood test given the very next week confirmed that my mom was already pregnant!! The kicker is that my mom had barely even missed her period. She was early into the pregnancy when these messages came to her...only a few weeks along. There was only what most would refer to as a clump of cells or a blob of tissue in her body, but the fact of the matter is, that was ME in there!!<br />
<br />
Already growing inside my mom was the little girl who loved to make up songs, choreograph dances, and catch tadpoles in the creek. The little girl who would write and perform puppet shows at church with her stuffed animals, drive her older siblings nuts, and beg her daddy to come play just one more game of bad mitten in the yard. The little girl, who grew into a young lady, who gathered friends and begged them to follow Jesus with her, who tried to lead by example...making plenty of mistakes along the way, but continuing to try nonetheless. The little girl, with dark brown hair and hazel eyes, who grew into a woman that would marry a preacher, have 3 little girls of her own, continue to make mistakes...but always, always continue to try.<br />
<br />
That was me. I was me then just as much as I am me now.<br />
<br />
For this reason, the PERSONHOOD of every "clump of cells", or "blob of tissue", or "product of conception" has always been a reality to me. When my mom got those 2 messages from God, the number of my own days had already begun. Only God knows the exact number of those days He decided to spill the beans about me coming, just as only He knows the number of that day that He will bring me home to meet Him face-to-face.<br />
<br />
Please let me be very, very clear. <b>Every life begins with God...my life, your life...every life. </b>And every life has purpose, no matter what circumstance that life is brought into. Every single person IS a person, no matter how small, and that person is very, very precious in the eyes of the Creator.<br />
<br />
Psalm 139:13 - 16 says,<br />
<br />
"For You created my inmost being;<br />
You knit me together in my mother's womb.<br />
I will praise You because I am fearfully and<br />
wonderfully made;<br />
Your works are wonderful,<br />
I know that full well.<br />
My frame was not hidden from You<br />
When I was made in the secret place.<br />
When I was woven together in the<br />
depths of the earth,<br />
Your eyes saw my unformed body.<br />
All the days ordained for me<br />
were written in Your book<br />
before one of them came to be."<br />
<br />
Just a short 3 years before God created me in my mother's womb, our Supreme Court decided to legalize and endorse the killing of millions of precious babies. 57 million to date. That blood is on the hands of those legalizing it in 1973, but it is also on ours because we have allowed it to continue.<br />
<br />
In the past few weeks, I have cried and cried as I have watched the undercover videos taken in abortion clinics. My gut reaction and the words that came out of my mouth were, "Dear God, who are we?"<br />
It's the question that rings over and over in my mind, and I've heard and read others who are asking the exact same thing. It's a valid question to a nation who is rapidly losing her moral foothold.<br />
<br />
Who are we?<br />
<br />
It is my belief that you can't truly understand the value of life until you understand the value of Your Creator. Collectively, as a nation, we have forgotten Him, and thus, we have lost our way. We have grown cold and turned from our first love, the love of Jehovah God, the God of our founders and our forefathers. We have chased money and pleasure to the point that greed has totally consumed us, so much so that even our leaders, the ones we elected, can't stand up for what's right. They have lost the fear of God and the moral backbone it takes to look squarely into the face of evil and say, "No more!"<br />
<br />
Church of America, this can not be overlooked. WAKE UP. WAKE UP. WAKE UP. If these videos and the revelation of the booming industry behind this massacre of our children can't shake the church to its core, I shutter to think of what it will take to do so. Truly I do.<br />
<br />
Humble yourself. Cry in repentance. Seek the forgiveness of Almighty God and give up your idols. Until we get desperate for the Lord and want Him more than we want a life of comfort and ease, money and pleasure, status and fame, nothing will change. Not one thing.<br />
<br />
We will only see it get worse.<br />
<br />
Maybe, just maybe, God answered the prayers of a woman asking for a baby girl to be born way back in 70's, because He knew that among many other things, she would stand for life, no matter what.<br />
<br />
Could it be that you and I both were created for such a time as this?<br />
<br />
Rise up. Stand with me. Together, let's look evil squarely in the face and declare, "No more!!!"</div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4706887314015666317.post-12509864863487194722015-02-16T06:00:00.000-05:002016-06-09T22:11:35.897-04:00Impacting the Darkness<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Just the other day...I looked across the room to see my youngest daughter trying to squeeze between the wall and our entertainment center. It looked like she was intently searching for something, but when I asked what she was doing, she said, "Mommy, I'm just looking at the darkness." She then showed me what was in her hand that stretched into the shadows...a toy pen that lights up. To a five year old, lighting up the darkness is a pretty cool thing to do!<br />
<br />
Last week, my Facebook newsfeed lit up with darkness. I looked into that darkness, long and hard, just like my daughter. I shook my head, wrung my hands, and thought, "Where does it all end?" It breaks my heart...this world...searching and clamoring for the new and the exciting and the exotic, while falling further and further into a deep pit that seeks only to entrap all of us. Evil abounds, and staring at it long enough always brings disillusionment. Discouragement. Disappointment. Frustration.<br />
<br />
Does it end? Will it end?<br />
<br />
One glorious day, at the Lord's appearing, YES! It will all end!!<br />
<br />
But until that time, how do those of us who long to live lives of righteousness and holiness carry on? How do we cultivate this space for the honor and the glory of the Father?<br />
<br />
Well, I can tell you this, talking about the problems around us and simply looking into the darkness will <u>not</u> bring any change! Shaking our heads and declaring, "What a pity!" does<br />
N-O-T-H-I-N-G.<br />
<br />
If you see your child drowning as you stand on the safety of the shore, do you just stand there? Do you watch them struggle? Do you watch them gasp for air and breathe their last, thinking "how sad that my child got themselves in that situation...what a tragedy?"<br />
<br />
Of course not!!!<br />
<br />
You run to their rescue just as fast as you possibly can!!!<br />
<br />
<b>And that, my friends, is exactly what we have to do with this present darkness.</b><br />
<br />
If you say you love Jesus, you put ACTIONS behind those WORDS. <br />
<br />
This conversation over sexual deviation and perversion is actually a good thing. It's a chance for the darkness to be further exposed! But friends, let's make sure this conversation <i>makes an impact</i> in this generation!!<br />
<br />
How can we do that? Here are just a few ideas:<br />
<br />
<b>1 - Pray.</b><br />
<br />
It's the greatest weapon at our disposal!! I'm a stay-at-home mom with limited time and freedom to volunteer right now, but I can pray earnestly for God to set victims free from their abusers, and I do!! I know He hears every prayer and answers each one. <br />
<br />
<b>2 - Give.</b><br />
<br />
May we take the money we have declared that we are NOT spending on certain movies, books, and magazines and put it towards <b>helping victims, </b>for they are the end result of this downward sexual spiral! Think about it...the $10 to $15 or more that you might have spent on going to a movie or buying a book can go instead towards the rescue and rehabilitation of victims. <br />
<br />
Here is a list of organizations that will put your money to good use:<br />
<a href="http://www.a21.org/" target="_blank">A21 Campaign</a><br />
<a href="http://www.ijm.org/" target="_blank">International Justice Mission</a><br />
<a href="http://www.hookersforjesus.net/" target="_blank">Hookers for Jesus</a><br />
<a href="http://www.justiceministries.org/" target="_blank">Justice Ministries, Inc</a><br />
<br />
<b>3 - Educate.</b><br />
<br />
Young <a href="http://www.fredstoeker.com/" target="_blank">men</a> and <a href="http://www.purefreedom.org/" target="_blank">women</a> desperately need us to help them navigate the issues in our world with truth from the Word of God. There are so many confusing and destructive messages being thrown at them, it breaks my heart!! But God's words can bring clarity of thought and freedom from the lies of the enemy. Also, you can educate yourself about the devastating effects of pornography by going <a href="http://www.thegospelcoalition.org/article/9-things-you-should-know-about-pornography-and-the-brain" target="_blank">here</a>.<br />
<br />
<b>4 - Love.</b><br />
<br />
Another end result of this darkness is the breakdown of the family. I have friends whose marriages have ended over sexual/pornographic addiction, others who are in crisis because of it right now, and others who are walking out healing/restoration. Have I told you this issue breaks my heart? It absolutely does. The <b>last thing</b> these families/friends need are judgement and condemnation. Love your friends the way you want to be loved...unconditionally. Hear their hearts and their hurts. Pray with them. Cry with them. Hold them accountable. Pray FOR them. But <u>do not</u> judge them.<br />
<br />
<b>5 - Guard.</b><br />
<br />
Be proactive. Guard your heart and your mind. When media like this comes out, don't jump on the bandwagon, flocking to book stores and movie theaters to partake in things that "everyone is doing". We are to be holy and set apart. Strangers in our own land. In the world, but not of the world. If we look and act just like this world, then we lose our effectiveness and we are no longer useful as salt and light! Also, help to guard the hearts and minds of those in your home. You can find help for that <a href="http://securemama.com/2014/02/06/protect-family-pornography/" target="_blank">here</a> and <a href="http://www.covenanteyes.com/learn-to-protect-your-family-with-this-free-how-to-guide/" target="_blank">here</a>. <br />
<br />
I pray that each of you will take this encouragement seriously. Join me in looking away from the darkness. Let's make a greater impact by shining the light of His truth! May this world begin to see us, not just for what we are against, but for what we are FOR...and may we stand for hope, freedom, love, rescue, and restoration in Jesus name!!</div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4706887314015666317.post-85594475859913297402014-12-18T13:05:00.000-05:002016-06-09T22:11:58.114-04:00Hope From a Christmas Float<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: "tahoma"; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px;">Just the other day…I </span><span style="font-family: "tahoma"; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px;">folded
myself onto the red and white Christmas float, ready to brave the cold,
wave at strangers, and hold my five year old, Abbie, in my lap as she
participated in her first Christmas parade. Sitting “criss-cross” is
not something I do often, so about twenty minutes in, my legs started
going numb. I realized very quickly…I am much older than the last time I
was in a Christmas parade! Besides that, I actually loved getting to
wave and smile and yell out “Merry Christmas!!!” along with the precious
little girls sitting beside me. It would have been an entirely magical
night, even with my legs going numb, except for the fact that Abbie kept
asking me over and over and over, “Where is Daddy? When will we see
Daddy? Are we close to seeing Daddy yet?”</span><br />
<br />
To say the child loves her Daddy is quite the understatement. The affection, I assure you, is mutual. In fact, when I arrived home from an event last week, the one tree in our front yard was decked out with blinking multi-colored lights, although everything else is “white lights only”. Why the colored lights on that particular tree? Well, because Abbie asked for them, that’s why, and my Abbie has her daddy wrapped around her little finger!! It’s that mutual affection, I tell you!<br />
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So, the questioning regarding the whereabouts of her beloved daddy was continuous and constant. Abbie was tolerating the hundreds of others along the parade route, but who she <b>really</b> wanted to see was her dad!<br />
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“We’ll be there soon, Abbie, just wave. It makes people happy to see you waving at them.”<br />
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“Daddy’s here. I know he’s looking for you, too! Just wait, it won’t be long.”<br />
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“Not too much further. You’ll see him!”<br />
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The longer she didn’t see him, the more impatient she became; and the more impatient she became, the shorter answers I gave (you know how it goes). Children are persistent! They won’t give up! They will, by golly, get an answer!!<br />
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Finally, I knew we were getting close to where he said he would be sitting. I saw familiar buildings, so I told her to start looking.<br />
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“He’s close!” I said...”Just ahead.”<br />
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We both sat up straighter. She and I scanned the crowd over and over, but didn’t see him. I frantically searched each face as we seemed to whiz by, even though 30 seconds prior we had seemed to be crawling. Just as I thought we must have missed him and prepared to break the bad news, there he was, standing tall and <i>smiling big</i> with his camera in hand.<br />
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Abbie spotted her daddy, gave him a joyful smile back, and immediately brought her hand to her mouth and blew him a huge air-kiss.<br />
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(Is your heart melting right now? Mine, too!)<br />
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Later that night, I was thinking over the events of the day when God, so sweetly, did a little prodding of my heart. You see, He and I have a conversation going on right now…one in which I continuously ask, “God, what are You doing with me?” and He answers with...<br />
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S I L E N C E<br />
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Ever been through that with Him? It’s difficult. It’s confusing. <br />
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In many ways, I’m just like my little Abbie when it comes to getting answers to my prayers. I know in time, I’ll see and understand. But it’s the waiting that’s getting to me…<br />
<br />
"WHERE'S DADDY?!" I ask.<br />
<br />
I ask over and over and over. I've been asking it for a while.<br />
<br />
"When will I see?"<br />
<br />
"When will I understand?"<br />
<br />
He might be getting a little impatient with me...;)<br />
<br />
But, He took me to a Christmas parade and let me have a special moment with my little girl and her daddy so that He could show me...<i>and now you</i>...this - -<br />
<br />
<b>He is just up ahead.</b><br />
<br />
It's not much further.<br />
<br />
Keep a look out. Sit up straight and search the crowd.<br />
<br />
See the signs. Keep trusting. Get excited!<br />
<br />
<b>He is not hiding. He's in plain sight.</b><br />
<br />
At the right moment, the clarity...the "seeing"...the understanding will come. And all this waiting? It will seem to have been like a fleeting shadow, much less dramatic and daunting than it is to you at the present time.<br />
<br />
And what about that moment you realize the wait is over, that He has answered your heart's cry?<br />
<br />
What about THAT moment...the one where your invisible faith meets a tangible reality?<br />
<br />
Undoubtedly, when that time comes, you'll take note...<br />
<br />
<i>that He is there...</i><br />
<br />
<i>your Father...</i><br />
<br />
<i>smiling back at you.</i><br />
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You'll be settled...refreshed...and you'll understand that <b>it is all just as He planned.</b><br />
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And who knows, you might even be tempted to blow Him an air-kiss...;) <br />
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<span style="color: #274e13;"><b>May God's unimaginable love surround you this Christmas!!!</b></span></div>
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Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4706887314015666317.post-51026366265463197292014-11-09T07:00:00.000-05:002016-06-09T22:12:27.485-04:00Abbie Turns Five - An Interview<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Just the other day...or actually about 1,825 days ago, my little miracle baby arrived. I call her a miracle because, well, some people who will remain nameless, thought we should stop having children after two. I, however, couldn't shake the feeling that God had one more blessing to give us. So I prayed and waited and prayed and believed and sure enough, that person who will remain nameless came around! Our precious and always entertaining Abigail turns FIVE today!! Unbelievable. Where has the time gone?<br />
<br />
My very first post waaaaayyyy back in 2008 was <a href="http://www.beckyleemeetze.com/2008/08/dilemma-what-to-write-first.html" target="_blank">an interview with our oldest</a>, Sydney, when she was 4. I also<a href="http://www.beckyleemeetze.com/2011/07/interview-with-princess-2.html" target="_blank"> interviewed our middle princess</a>, Kylee, when she was 4. Needless to say, I couldn't leave "baby" Abbie out, so today, as she turns 5, I want to share her interview here. I may or may not have almost let her turn 5 without interviewing her. Poor third child! She gets the worn-out, not-quite-so-organized me as a mom. Heaven help her.<br />
<br />
1. <b>What do you think heaven looks like? </b>There are no bad people there. The sky is blue. There are trees and a sun. There are animals, like horses and giraffes...and Adam and Eve are there. It's warm! There's no thunder. They don't have money. Oh, and there's a sea with boats!<br />
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2. <b>What does Dad do at work?</b> He does stuff on the computer and hmmmmm...he teaches people.<br />
<br />
3. <b>What do you think your husband will be like?</b> (She giggled at that question!) Maybe like Daddy. He'll have light brown hair, a car, and lots of shoes......and we'll have a baby!<br />
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4. <b>If you were going to spend one year on a desert island and could only take three things with you, what would they be?</b> A book, "Cuddle Kitty", and a princess dress.<br />
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5. <b>Who is your favorite aunt and why?</b> Aunt Schuyla, because she has baby Jacob.<br />
<br />
6. <b>Who is your favorite uncle and why?</b> Uncle Allan, because he has Alayna.<br />
<br />
7. <b>What do you think Joseph and Mary heard in the stable on Christmas night? </b>Angels, birds, and coyotes.<br />
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8. <b>What do you think Joseph and Mary smelled in the stable on Christmas night?</b> Food.<br />
<br />
9. <b>What is the nicest thing I ever did for you?</b> Hugging & kissing me...oh, and taking me places.<br />
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10. <b>When is a time that I hurt your feelings? </b>When I hit and kick and get in trouble for it.<br />
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11. <b>When is a time that you were really mad at me?</b> I'm never mad at you!<br />
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12. <b>If you could be a movie character who would you be and why?</b> Elsa, because she has powers.<br />
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13. <b>What is your favorite outfit? </b>My costume.<br />
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14. <b>What is the hardest part of being four years old?</b> When I can't get to sleep.<br />
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15. <b>What has been your favorite childhood memory?</b> When baby Jacob was born.<br />
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16. <b>If you could be an animal for a day, which one would you be and why?</b> A dolphin, because I like them. We see them at the beach!<br />
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<i><b>HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SWEET ABIGAIL!!!</b></i></div>
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Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4706887314015666317.post-37031096162735718962014-07-02T10:12:00.000-04:002016-06-09T22:13:03.224-04:00God Sent Us Dolphins<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Just the other day...a much smaller version of myself sat across from my dad at the local Wendy's restaurant in our small town. I was probably about 10 or 11 years old. It was a Sunday night tradition to eat one of two places after church, there or at the Dairy Queen just down the street. Our topic of conversation was not pleasant, it was painful, in fact. I vividly recall questioning something I had heard in the sermon that night and remember my sweet daddy trying to set my incorrect thinking straight...<br />
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His words went something like this, "You misunderstood. God is not vindictive or angry, Becky. He is not waiting for you to mess up so He can squash you or point a finger at you and say, 'I told you so!'...He loves you so much and has good things planned for you."<br />
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Those are words that have played over and over in my head for years. When I remember that conversation, it's almost like I'm an outsider looking in. I can see it, feel it...smell it even. I remember the intense eagerness to believe it with all of my heart, that night and many nights since.<br />
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It has been a fight my entire life to believe that there is grace for me, that God is "okay" with me messing up and making mistakes. Not only that, but I've had a hard time believing in His goodness...that He is just good to me, well, because it's His character and He simply wants to be! I fight the false thinking that I have to work for every reward and be good enough to avoid His anger. If you could listen in on my thoughts, they might sound like this -- "Am I doing enough for you, God? Am I disappointing You? You must really hate it when I ______ or _______. I'm so sorry I'm not living up to all I should be. I wish I could do better, BE better, blah, blah, blah." The rhetoric sometimes goes on and on.<br />
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On a recent day at the beach, much of the same conversation with God took place. We had taken an early vacation just before the craziness of our much-too-packed summer began. I was walking down the boardwalk, having similar thoughts, wanting so much to please God but not knowing how to do so...wanting to feel worthy of His love, I guess. And, just as He always does, God sweetly began reassuring me and loving on me and telling me over and over about His goodness. He began to tear down my excuses (see above list). He let me know that He delighted in showering me with good things, just because, and that every fear that I had was unfounded and NOT of Him.<br />
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<b>And then He did something absolutely spectacular to prove His point.</b><br />
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We had heard that this particular beach was known for having dolphins nearby, and if you know anything about my middle child, you know she is mildly obsessed with the creatures. Well, this was the last day of our vacation and we still had not seen any, though we had looked and looked. The night before, I had quickly prayed,<i> "God, will you please let Kylee see a dolphin before we leave?"</i><br />
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So there I was, walking along listening to God remind me about His goodness and by this point we had reached the beach. My husband and kids were still walking towards the water and I stopped, glanced out at the waves, and immediately my eyes fell on two dorsal fins gracefully breaking the surface.<br />
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NO WAY, I thought!<br />
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I quickly pointed and yelled for my family to look. Within minutes, they saw them, too. They excitedly ran along the water's edge, trying to get a closer look. Very soon it became apparent...there were not just two dolphins, but SIX!!<br />
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I jumped up and down, laughing out loud like a kid at Christmas, so very excited!! There was hardly anyone else on the beach. It was an absolutely gorgeous day. The sky was bright blue with fluffy white clouds. The water sparkled all around the majestic creatures passing us by. It was picture-perfect, like a scene right out of a movie!<br />
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<b>The intensity of that moment hit me like a ton of bricks.</b><br />
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In utter awe of my God I stood there and let His goodness overwhelm me, like waves crashing over my soul, as He brought my request to mind. I did not just let a single tear roll down my cheek. No. I sobbed like a baby on that beach, overcome with the awesomeness of Him. Who am I, that the Creator would command His dolphins to come, just because I very quickly requested them the night before? More importantly, what does that say about the heart of the One who cares so deeply about each one of us?!<br />
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In that moment, it is as if God simply wanted to give me a tangible, in real life, picture of His of GOODNESS. It didn't come because I had labored in hours of prayer, nor because I had given all my wealth to the poor. It didn't come because I had been a perfect wife and mother that day, nor because I had a global ministry reaching thousands. It didn't come because I teach an Sunday School class, tithe faithfully, or share the gospel message with 25 people per week.<br />
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No.<br />
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That moment came because God cared that I was struggling a bit with doubts about His character. Again. For the bazillionth time in my 37 years on this earth, even though I <u>know</u> the truth. And He didn't roll His eyes and say, "Here we go again" either.<br />
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He said, "My daughter is hurting and I'm going to fix it."<br />
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And He did.<br />
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Because that's what Fathers do.<br />
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<b>"The Lord directs the steps of the godly. He delights in every detail of their lives." Psalm 37:23</b><br />
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Linking up at:<br />
<b><a href="http://www.missionalwomen.com/faith-filled-friday-blog-link-up" target="_blank">Missional Women</a></b></div>
</div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4706887314015666317.post-517047223044459862014-02-13T11:13:00.000-05:002016-06-09T22:18:54.821-04:00Pondering the Call to Motherhood<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Just the other day...I gently rocked my sweet Abigail, back and forth in rhythmic time, watching her little body go limp as slumber overtook her. She had played hard that day, so sleep came quickly. On a normal night, she would chitter-chatter and sing and pray forever - - telling God just how much she loved Him and eeevery single person in her life (God <b>knows</b> my Abbie is thankful!), then I would put her in bed, tell her goodnight, and walk out. But this was not an ordinary night. That night, her tiredness allowed me the pleasure of rocking her to sleep like I use to when she was a baby. I was thankful for a fleeting "mommy moment"...a chance once more to stroke her cheek and hum a song, a chance to sit and ponder how we got here so very fast. No matter how hard I chase them, the "little years" keep slipping from my grasp.<br />
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My babies are growing up...as they should...but still, I marvel at it all - - how a young girl can dream about marriage and the babies that will someday come, and then how someday comes and goes <i>way too fast</i>. I look forward to the years ahead with great anticipation, but now with just a tinge of sadness, knowing how rapidly the time will go.<br />
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Bittersweet. That's what it is.<br />
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I love that verse in the Bible that says, "But Mary kept all these things and pondered them in her heart." She weighed all that she was hearing about the Child to come...the past, the present, and the future...keeping them as "heart treasures", only to herself.<br />
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It's in the pondering that I feel so connected to her, drawn to the woman who had such trust in God that she said yes to bringing forth His Son, without hesitation. It's like she knew she was made for that very reason! In the moment the angel spoke, my guess is that great purpose settled upon her heart. The heart that had always <i>known</i> received its long-awaited confirmation.<br />
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I know deep down that mothering is and always has been a part of my purpose as well. Like Mary, I ponder the mystery and the magic of it all...the past, the present, and things to come. The fact that I might be chosen to have such a calling is too much for me at times. I wake up every day humbled that I <i><u>get</u></i> to be a mother.<br />
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Don't let the world tell you, my sweet friend and fellow-mother, that <i>any part of your service</i> is commonplace<i>. IT IS NOT.</i><br />
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<b>It is part of your calling and what a high-calling it is! Your precious, pondering heart knows it well!</b><br />
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So run the race with diligence, knowing that God is smiling on you in this journey, my friend. When you fill hungry bellies, soothe hurting hearts, dry sloppy tears, clean grass-stained clothes, recite math facts, drill memory verses, sacrifice so that they can have, and go to bed exhausted for the thousandth time, do it with joy, for you, my friend, have honored your God. He has invited you into this service to Him and you, daily, are answering His call.<br />
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We don't know much about the every-dayness of Mary's life as a young mother...but I can assure you, she was doing practically the same things you are. She served her sweet little Jesus-boy and loved Him to the core of her being. She made sure His every need was taken care of. She held Him and nurtured Him and rocked Him to sleep...I'm sure still pondering the majesty of it all in her heart.<br />
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<b>God knew Jesus needed Mary.</b><br />
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<b>God knows your children need <u>you</u>.</b><br />
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So kill the doubts - - you are enough. Shut out the discouraging ones - - their opinions don't matter. Quiet the comparisons - - you are uniquely gifted for <u>your</u> family. Cease the worrying - - you, and your children, are in the palm of His mighty hand!<br />
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I pray, today, that as you look into the faces of your children - - though they be tiny and new, or older and worn - - you'll get a glimpse of <b>your</b> purpose and wonder at the majesty of it all.<br />
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<div style="text-align: center;">
Linking up at: </div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<a href="http://www.raisinghomemakers.com/">Raising Homemakers</a><br />
<a href="http://www.missionalwomen.com/faith-filled-friday-blog-link-up.html" target="_blank">Missional Women</a><br />
<a href="http://whatjoyismine.net/mondays-musings-100-pimpin-joy/#sthash.a8GtDOkh.dpbs" target="_blank">What Joy is Mine</a></div>
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Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4706887314015666317.post-29530599262150390262014-02-05T09:30:00.000-05:002016-06-09T22:21:02.508-04:00Struggling With an Idol<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I see you there, waiting on the other side of the keyboard. I see the puzzled look on your face as you have wondered about the long pauses in my writing and my lack of using social media to communicate.<br />
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There are many reasons why (motherhood comes to mind), but mostly this - - I am struggling with an idol. The odd thing is, writing and social media, those aren't idols for me. I won't say they never have been because there are times in my life I had to have my "facebook fix" or else! But not recently.<br />
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Lately, my idol is you.<br />
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It's my neighbor, the new moms in my homeschooling co-op, the people at church, ladies I serve with, family members, my mom's friend from church who just started reading the blog, the "professional" co-worker I hide my writing from like it's a scandalous secret (trusting that I'm too unimportant to google, and besides that would be creepy)...basically, it's everyone I have contact with in real life! It's okay to write for "anonymous" readers, but somehow in the last year, I've started wanting the approval of the people I rub elbows with more than I've sought after the approval of God when it comes to writing here. Ouch, ouch, and ouch.<br />
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The once fearless, go-get-'em me morphed into an approval junkie.<br />
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I've wanted to be liked more than I've wanted to follow this God-given passion. I've wanted to hide more than stand on a stage. The roar in my ear to keep quiet forced me into submission because I have feared that my authenticity would bring a reproach, or even worse, rejection.<br />
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In allowing myself to give in to fear, I have hurt my precious Lord and the tears streaming down my face are no match for the heaviness in my chest over my sin, though I know that He has already forgiven me.<br />
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And yet...I am a firm believer in the fact that my God never wastes a trial. He's been doing deep things while I've been quiet. He and I have wrestled a good bit over the past year's struggles. I've learned new things. I've repented. I've surrendered. I've grown in my walk. And now, I've drawn a new line in the sand. The enemy has been after my words<i>...but he will not have them.</i><br />
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To all of you who have become my idols - - I'm officially giving you up. This is your notice. I will no longer bank on your approval. I can't. It has killed my freedom and stolen an element of joy from me. It has caused me to sin by placing you in a position of authority rather than Christ.<br />
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I am committing to crush the head of fear and take hold of courage once more. There are words to write, hearts to encourage, speeches to give, lives to motivate, and stories to tell...all for the glory of God. I am determined to care more about the message of Christ than about public opinion, even if it means some people think I'm weird, or off, or out there, or too all-about-Jesus-for-my-own-good.<br />
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I believe that far too many of us keep trying to blend in, ignoring the fact that God <u>intends</u> for us to stand out.<br />
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<i>It's time to stand out.</i></div>
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<b>"You are the light of the world - - like a city on a hilltop that cannot be hidden."</b></div>
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<b> Matt 5:14 </b></div>
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Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4706887314015666317.post-28001667026247354842014-01-15T09:37:00.000-05:002014-01-15T09:37:02.832-05:00Notes from Dad<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I went to Belk a few days ago to purchase some new products at the makeup counter. Remembering the gift card I had received from my dad at Christmas, I handed it to the cashier.<br />
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"Oh, Ma'am...I'm sorry" I said, "but could I please have the outer card back. There's a note on it from my dad that I really wanted to keep."<br />
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She obliged and I safely tucked the treasure back into my purse. I felt a little silly asking for the note back - - but had she refused, I might have jumped the counter to get it!<br />
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<b><a href="http://www.womenofembrace.com/1/post/2014/01/notes-from-dad.html">Click here to continue reading...</a></b><br />
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For His glory,<br />
<br /></div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4706887314015666317.post-59487564065488380032013-11-21T11:27:00.001-05:002013-11-21T11:45:47.573-05:00Why I Came Out as a Post-Abortive Christian Woman (Whitney's Story, Part 3)<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">*If you missed the beginning of this 3-part series, please <a href="http://www.beckyleemeetze.com/2013/11/why-i-came-out-as-post-abortive.html">click here.</a></span></div>
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We have to remember that there is no neutral influence that floats around somewhere “out there”. We are under influence from God or Satan. There is no other source of influence in our lives. 1 Peter 5:8 & 9 warns us…<br />
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<b>“Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour. Stand firm against him, and be strong in your faith.”</b><br />
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In my life, Satan’s roars have always been in the form of a whisper in my ear...“God’s promises are not for you.” “If anyone knew…” “You’re not good enough.” While Satan has never devoured me physically I have allowed him to devour my hope, joy and confidence in the woman God says I am...<br />
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<b>“Even before he made the world, God loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in his eyes. God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure. So we praise God for the glorious grace he has poured out on us who belong to his dear Son. He is so rich in kindness and grace that he purchased our freedom with the blood of his Son and forgave our sins. He has showered his kindness on us, along with all wisdom and understanding.” Ephesians 1:4-8</b><br />
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This tells me that even before God spoke the world into existence, He knew me, knew every single mess I would ever make, and it still gave Him great pleasure to make a way for a relationship with me. Now, that is something that restores my hope, joy, and confidence.<br />
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This sort of brings this story full-circle. At the beginning I described what this story is not. Here is what it is and why I felt God called me to share it…<br />
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God has been good to me. He has blessed me and manifested himself in so many ways in my life. He has taken my brokenness and made me whole again. I know the pain of living in isolation, condemnation, and self-doubt. He has a divine plan of ministry for each one of us. He knows the pain of this world. He doesn’t heal our wounds just for our benefit but so we can minister to others. His word tells us that clearly…<br />
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<b>“All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.” 2 Corinthians 1:3 & 4</b><br />
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If you’re reading this and you are a post-abortive woman, feeling like you’re all alone, let me help you out with that. Based on statistics from the US Census Bureau in 2008 – the most recent numbers available - there were 1,211,500 abortions in the US, 33,140 of which were in my state of North Carolina. Abortion providers are self reporting so it’s reasonable to assume this number is higher. Very seldom does a woman experience an abortion alone. There is almost always a mom, dad, husband, boyfriend, friend, or sister along as well, which at least doubles the number of people affected. If you want to bring in abortion doctors, nurses, the folks at the front desk, the bio-hazard drivers, etc. that number easily triples. That’s a lot of walking wounded people. To break that into a digestible bite, in North Carolina that’s 17.5 abortions for every 1000 pregnancies in 2008. Based on information from National Right to Life numbers there have been 54,599,615 abortions in the US since 1973. For more detail, the US Center for Disease Control has a comprehensive report of pretty much anything you’d want to know.<br />
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The tricky part of this type of ministry is the fear that too much grace to the sinner negates the severity of the sin. I don’t see any examples of that in scripture. (Rom. 8:1) We must continue to fight for the life of the unborn. God is the creator of life and, as believers, we must hold to that truth. But abortion is a complicated multi-layered cancer within our culture. The devastation it leaves in its wake has an enormous ripple effect that permeates our families and our society on every level of race, socio-economic position, religion, level of education. We’re all affected by abortion whether we realize it or not just by the sheer number of post-abortive people in our midst. Where do you think all those people are? We’re everywhere. Abortion not only robs the physical lives of our next generation, but also robs the spirit of those who perpetrate and participate in abortions. The church will never be able to have a significant effect on reducing or overturning our abortion laws without recognizing the problem extends beyond the walls of the abortion clinic. To do that, the church must become the lighthouse of healing and truth as opposed to a place of even more shame to pile on. An unbelieving world does not have the indwelling of the Holy Spirit to discern the difference between condemnation and conviction, and without Godly conviction there can be no restoration.<br />
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I’m learning that ministry is messy. You have to let people get in your business, and you have to get right back into their business. It is raw and uncomfortable. But if we really want to make a difference, it is completely necessary.<br />
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If you’ve been affected by an abortion in any capacity, there is so much help available. I’ve listed information below for two ministries that I’ve been involved in that will walk you through God’s word for restoration and redemption. <br />
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God’s word is true! Cling to what Jesus tells us in John 10:9-11…<br />
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<b>“I am the door. If anyone enters by me, he will be saved and will come in and go out and find pasture. A thief comes only to steal and to kill and to destroy. I have come so that they may have life and have it in abundance. I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep.”</b><br />
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He doesn’t say if only the “good” people enter but “if anyone”. He reminds us of Satan’s goal for us. His promise of not just a good life, but an abundant one! Abundance is defined as: a copious supply; great amount, bountiful, overflowing. Reading this verse now on this side of the cross, we know that Jesus knew what it would cost Him to fulfill this promise to us.<br />
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Sweet friend, know that just because you have an abortion in your past God still has a plan for you. Don’t be deceived into thinking you have no value in whatever path God calls you to. Cling to His promises.<br />
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In His love & grace.<br />
<br />
Whitney<br />
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<u>For more information on Post-Abortion Recovery contact:</u><br />
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Sandy Day at Caleb Ministries<br />
<a href="http://www.calebministries.org/">www.calebministries.org</a><br />
704.841.1320<br />
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Charlotte Pregnancy Resource Center<br />
<a href="http://www.prccharlotte.com/">www.prccharlotte.com</a><br />
704.372.5981<br />
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**Each of these organizations have been contacted about these series of posts and are ready to help.<br />
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**You can contact Whitney directly by emailing her at FullOfGrace@att.net<br />
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<u>Additional links</u>:<br />
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<a href="http://www.surrenderingthesecret.com/">www.surrenderingthesecret.com</a><br />
<a href="http://www.focusonthefamily.com/">www.focusonthefamily.com</a><br />
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;"><o:p>[</o:p><span class="MsoFootnoteReference"><span class="MsoFootnoteReference"><span style="font-family: Cambria, serif;">3]</span></span></span> http://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/preview/mmwrhtml/ss6108a1.htm?s_cid=ss6108a1_w</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><b>Whitney Burrows</b> is a North Florida girl raised on the banks of her beloved Suwannee River & Gulf Coast. After 12 years in the world of banking, she moved into full-time-homemaker mode as mom to James and Pearce, and wife to Burges. The last 18 years have been a fun flurry of sports, meal prep, scraped knees, room/team mom, chauffeuring, and volunteering. Whitney lives for all things family, friends, southern, and outdoors. She has been extremely blessed by God’s grace and loves encouraging women to embrace the abundant life promised to us by our Savior. She believes life becomes a wonderful (but not always easy) adventure when we stop running from the Lord, listen to His voice, and trust in His call on our lives.</span></div>
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Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4706887314015666317.post-11258819450333315002013-11-20T00:30:00.000-05:002013-11-22T00:19:47.300-05:00Why I Came Out as a Post-Abortive Christian Woman (Whitney's Story, Part 2)<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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*If you missed Part 1 and need to catch up, <a href="http://www.beckyleemeetze.com/2013/11/why-i-came-out-as-post-abortive.html">click here.</a><br />
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Moving on down the road, several years later I found myself with a lot of time on my hands. Our family experienced a painful and swift breakup within our circle of friends. The calendar I made sure was consistently full of dinners together, play dates, and morning coffees was now painfully open. My phone stopped ringing. There were no discussions on where to meet for lunch or carpool challenges to get us and all of our kids somewhere. Quiet. The one thing that I had worked so hard all my adult life to avoid had become reality. My greatest fear, the fear of rejection, had been dropped squarely in my lap and there was nothing I could do about it. True to my insecurity I tried to “fix” it, but the harder I tried the worse I made it. Eventually had to accept the fact that I had been rejected. The brokenness and self loathing I’d lived with for so long was now justified. This was the affirmation that I never deserved any of the good I had experienced. It had finally caught up with me and pressed down on me to the point I thought I would break.<br />
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<b>But God…</b><br />
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Around this time I was listening to the radio and heard on my local Christian station a woman whose voice was infectious and full of life. As I zeroed in on the interview I heard the word post-abortive. After I caught my breath, I began to listen to her story of redemption and restoration. I even heard happiness and joy in her voice! I had never really known how to label myself, but as I listened she was telling MY story. I couldn't believe there was another woman “out there” like me. But, bless her heart, she was talking just like anyone else. As the interview went on I discovered that she had a post-abortive ministry! What?! I went straight to my computer and sure enough, there it was. That day began a series of communication that led to a friendship that led to a Bible study that changed my life. There are too many details to share here, but I had no doubt that God placed my new friend in my life at that particular time. She and I actually began scrapbooking together (<u>love</u> to scrapbook) every week or two for about a year, and she and I would meet at my house to “work”. However, what was really happening was God using her to mentor and pour into me the truth of His word. You see as I can look back now, the relationships with my circle of friends was not bad in itself. But because I used those relationships for my constant distraction, I’m convinced the Lord removed me so I would be open for this gift of restoration He was preparing. I would have never made room for that otherwise. Yes, the breakup was painful, and yes, sorting through my “mess” was painful and slow! But, as believers, when the rug is pulled out from under us we have to choose how to move through it. God does not forsake us, but sometimes He does have to re-order our lives so we can/will listen only to Him.<br />
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I knew that I had repented of my “sin” and that God had forgiven me, I just could not “forgive myself”. We hear that term frequently in our culture & I totally owned that mindset. It somehow felt like an adequate penance to carry around. But the truth is, the Bible says nothing about forgiving ourselves. As I dove into scripture to see how to sort through all of this, one of the most powerful truths I discovered was to not “forgive myself” was really saying to God that the work of the cross was okay for everyone else, but not for me. "My sin is too big for that," I thought. This self condemnation I beat myself with was really a lack of fully acknowledging who Jesus Christ was to me. If I could not move on from this self-inflicted spiritual and emotional isolation, I had to revisit everything I said I believed. Now, I didn’t consciously intend or feel I was elevating myself above Christ, but my years of distorted thinking had kept me from truly submitting myself to His authority. It was easier for me to internalize the condemnation piece of the gospel, but much harder to accept the grace because I didn’t deserve it and my story was so awful. That’s when it hit me. All sin is awful. All sin separates us from a holy God. I had confused the consequence of the sin with the degree of the sin. I did that – not God. Jesus died to cover my sin of abortion with the same fervor as covering the sin of omission, gossip, spinning the truth, or any other of the “small” sins. There is no high or low degree of sin. I could no longer say that I believed one part (condemnation) without also believing the part of grace and restoration. I wasn’t doing God any “favors” by holding on to my brokenness. What I was really doing was diluting what He had done for me and telling Him it was not enough!<br />
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That had to sink in with me for a few days. Did I really mean that? Could I really say to God that His plan for the redemption for mankind was a sweet attempt, but that was just not going to be enough for some of us?<br />
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Of course not.<br />
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(Please stop in tomorrow to <a href="http://www.beckyleemeetze.com/2013/11/why-i-came-out-as-post-abortive_21.html">read Part 3</a> of Whitney's story, or <a href="http://feedburner.google.com/fb/a/mailverify?uri=JustTheOtherDay&loc=en_US">Subscribe to Just the other day... by Email</a> so that you never miss a post.)</div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #797979; font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'Lucida Grande', sans-serif; font-size: x-small; line-height: 21px;"><b>Whitney Burrows</b></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #797979; font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'Lucida Grande', sans-serif; font-size: xx-small; line-height: 21px;"> is a North Florida girl raised on the banks of her beloved Suwannee River and Gulf Coast. After 12 years in the world of banking, she moved into full-time- homemaker mode as mom to James and Pearce, and wife to Burges. The last 18 years have been a fun flurry of sports, meal prep, scraped knees, room/team mom, chauffeuring, and volunteering. Whitney lives for all things family, friends, southern, and outdoors. She has been extremely blessed by God’s grace and loves encouraging women to embrace the abundant life promised to us by our Savior. She believes life becomes a wonderful (but not always easy) adventure when we stop running from the Lord, listen to His voice, and trust in <i>His</i> call on our lives. </span></div>
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For His glory,</div>
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Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4706887314015666317.post-65244359222173098722013-11-19T02:10:00.001-05:002013-11-20T10:05:40.277-05:00Why I Came Out as a Post-Abortive Christian Woman (Whitney's Story, Part 1) <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Yes...I'm going there. Before I tell you what the purpose of this is, let me tell you what it is not. This is not a public confession of a past sin - I've already done that to the only person who has the power and position to require that...He was very gracious to me (Rom 8:1). This is also not a "battle-cry" for every other post-abortive Christian woman to "come out of the closet". This is my story of what happens when you stop running from God's call on your life, come to a place of surrender, and move on with it.<br />
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First off, to understand where we are going, you need a little information on where I am coming from…<br />
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I had an abortion at the tender age of sixteen. As with every life-changing event there are many details I'll skip over (unless you're a post-abortive woman and would like to talk). I will say that the same issues that influenced my behavior prior to my abortion are the same issues that influenced my decision to have an abortion...fear of rejection, insecurity, low self-image.<br />
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Now, everyone has a different experience, but there are some behaviors that are pretty consistent with many post-abortive women. You would think that a teenage pregnancy and subsequent abortion would snatch a "good girl" back on the right path. Well...you'd be wrong. You see, once that line has been crossed, fear, insecurity, and low self-image have some new friends to pile on...self-condemnation and self-loathing topped with a crippling heap of guilt. For me, that manifested itself into a very tightly wound Type A, high-strung, focused, stubbornly independent and driven young woman. These traits are not inherently bad or destructive unless they are, in fact, your best-attempt to keep your mess pressed down so you don't have to think about it or yourself.<br />
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I'm now skipping over the many details of a decade of hard work, hard play, and toxic relationships....<br />
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However, God is so good. In spite of myself He brought an incredible man into my life. Praise God…I had a momentary flash of lucidity when he asked me to marry him.<br />
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Ours is a beautifully ordinary story. We married, moved to Charlotte, and started our family. After the birth of our first child, the hunger for validation through my work ceased. Thus began my journey as a full-time stay-at-home-mom. I loved it, and two years later we were blessed with a second son. I comfortably settled into my sweet family bliss. For the first time in my life, I felt completely sure of my purpose. There was only one problem, though, as I began to mature in my spiritual life my sons were growing also. For the first time my heart came face to face with what I had done all those years ago. As I watched my boys develop their own personalities, friends, and interests, the gravity of the lie I bought into so long ago rained down on me. You see, having two boys so close in age made me realize that they weren't my "do over,” they were not "copies" of my aborted child. They were the "people" God had ordained them to be from the beginning of time. (Eph.1:4-5) The lie our culture is being fed that "It's not even a baby yet. It’s only tissue; it's like getting a tooth pulled…" is a lie straight from the pit of hell. In my heart, I knew that truth at sixteen, and as a woman in her mid-thirties my heart was now breaking over it. Praise God that the science of today can now show how perfectly put together a baby is very early into pregnancy. Advance technology has been no friend to our pro-choice brothers and sisters.<br />
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What to do, what to do. I knew the time had come that I had to tell my husband, Burges. Now, I had not kept it from him out of fear, I just didn't think it involved him (no - I didn't have a Godly understanding of marriage either). After all I didn't even know him until many years beyond sixteen. But, again, God is so good. He convicts us in small bites that we can digest. If He had brought all of this down on me at one time I would have broken completely. I did tell Burges and, as is his way, he was so kind. He reassured me that I was a good mom. He would forgive me, but more importantly reminded me that God had forgiven me too. I desperately needed to hear that and it was helpful. However, I remained severely messed up.<br />
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I thought "confessing" to my husband would "fix" me, but it didn't. Oh, it helped, but you see, the thing about carrying around a secret is that it's very isolating. Now, I'm not talking about a secret that someone has entrusted to you (although you have to be careful about that, too). I'm talking about your own "if anyone ever knew who I really was or what I've done they would..." kind of secret. The kind of secret that erodes your self-worth, value, and confidence. The kind of secret that produces a facade that takes an extraordinary amount of energy to project to the world. The kind of secret that will make you completely overcrowd your calendar intentionally, making sure there is no down time, because as long as you stay distracted you don't have to think too much and risk facing what you have made a life running from. You see, that's where Satan likes us. If we stay isolated in our minds and physically busy, he is able to play the tapes of self-incrimination over and over again until they begin to provide a twisted and familiar comfort. "Of course I can't do (insert any new spiritual endeavor here), God would never bless a woman "like me" to shine for Him. I'll just stay in the background and be grateful for the crumbs."<br />
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Around this time I was in a Bible Study with some other young moms. This season of life was filled with play-dates, new friendships, and a newfound desire for God's Word. I loved my once-a-week study…not only because it provided free childcare, but I loved the women I was making friends with and the spiritual maturity I saw in them. I made the comment often that I never expected to have such sweet relationships in my adult life! It was a special time.<br />
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On a certain day, the topic of abortion came up in our study. Now for the non-post-abortive women (or men) reading this, I'll tell you what goes on when that happens, because there is a lot of effort in this particular moment to cover it up and we post-abortive women do it pretty well. First, all of the air is sucked out of our lungs. Second is the recognition that we're not breathing. Third, we're not hearing anything anyone is saying for the next few seconds because all we hear is the sound of our hearts beating so fast we fear we're going into a-fib. No, I’m not being dramatic. Finally, by this time our lungs are crying for the air we've deprived them of and basically we are just trying to not hyper-ventilate and pass out - all without anyone noticing. This is no easy feat. However, even with all of this going on, I began to feel like maybe that day, I could confide in my friends the weight I had been carrying. After all, we were studying about the blood of Christ covering all of our sins, redemption, restoration, etc. I took a deep breath to speak and suddenly one of my friends threw her hands in the air, pushed back from the table and said, "Who does this? What kind of woman would kill her child? I don't even know anyone like this."<br />
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As I write these words years later, the tone and disgust in her voice still rings in my ears…and it still stings. Needless to say, I swallowed my words. I continued to attempt to regulate my breathing and I shut my mouth. Tight. And I kept it shut for a very, very, very long time. That was all the confirmation I needed to know I was on my own and my secret must be kept to myself. It was clear that if any of these sweet church friends knew how awful I really was, I would be totally rejected because they would not associate with someone like me. While I remained physically engaged, emotionally I protected myself by further isolating my mind. Satan loved this, I’m sure, because it gave him unencumbered reign in my thoughts and mind. After my friend's heartfelt disclosure I sat there and nodded in agreement with everyone else.<br />
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Why? Because that's what we do.<br />
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(Please <a href="http://www.beckyleemeetze.com/2013/11/why-i-came-out-as-post-abortive-woman.html">CLICK HERE</a> for Part 2 of Whitney's story - - <a href="http://feedburner.google.com/fb/a/mailverify?uri=JustTheOtherDay&loc=en_US">Subscribe to Just the other day... by Email</a> so that you never miss a post!)<br />
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Linking up at:</div>
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<a href="http://www.timewarpwife.com/">Titus 2sdays</a>, <a href="http://www.growinghomeblog.com/">Teach Me Tuesday</a>, <a href="http://www.raisinghomemakers.com/">Raising Homemakers</a></div>
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<span style="color: #797979; font-family: Lucida Sans Unicode, Lucida Grande, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 21px;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Whitney Burrows</span><span style="font-size: xx-small;"> is a North Florida girl raised on the banks of her beloved Suwannee River and Gulf Coast. After 12 years in the world of banking, she moved into full-time- homemaker mode as mom to James and Pearce, and wife to Burges. The last 18 years have been a fun flurry of sports, meal prep, scraped knees, room/team mom, chauffeuring, and volunteering. Whitney lives for all things family, friends, southern, and outdoors. She has been extremely blessed by God’s grace and loves encouraging women to embrace the abundant life promised to us by our Savior. She believes life becomes a wonderful (but not always easy) adventure when we stop running from the Lord, listen to His voice, and trust in <i>His</i> call on our lives. </span></span></span><br />
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For His glory,</div>
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Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4706887314015666317.post-87973491699979523222013-11-11T11:29:00.001-05:002016-06-09T22:24:24.899-04:00Number Three Turns Four<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Just the other day...our precious Abigail made her debut in this world. As a matter of fact, it was four years ago! I thought singing the birthday song all day and talking about her being four would make the reality of this milestone more real, but so far, that has not happened. I still can't wrap my brain around her being four!<br />
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Abbie's arrival was full of joy, but soon met with overwhelming anxiety. <a href="http://www.beckyleemeetze.com/2011/11/princess-3-and-panic-attack.html">You can read that story here.</a> I remember countless hours spent rocking and singing my sweet Abbie to sleep. I also remember the tears streaming down my face while my other two girls played just outside the door, unable to fully take care of them anymore...or so I felt. My heart was pulled in so many directions after having our third. I was in survival-mode far too often. I can only pray my kids don't have to dish out mega-bucks in therapy fees as a result!<br />
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If any child has been a challenge from day one, Abbie has been it! She is sneaky and head-strong. If you tell her "don't do it", she's going to do it...with a twinkle in her eye! This is my child who actually laughs as she's being scolded for getting into trouble. But for all the mischief and grief she has put me through, she is as sweet as they come...and I'm not just saying that!<br />
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Abbie loves fiercely. She's the first one to let out a long, southern-twanged, "Awwwwww!", when she sees something cute, like a puppy or a baby. She's the first one to jump up and say, "I'll help!" when asked. She takes care of her big sisters just as much as, or at times even more than, they take care of her. And, Abbie gives the tightest around-the-neck hugs I have ever experienced. You <b>know it</b> when you've had a hug from that little love bug!<br />
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Abbie also loves to talk. I thought my ears were tired before she came along, but oh wow, they were just being conditioned for the years to come! The child has something to say allllll day long! She's the kind of child that "never meets a stranger", so consider yourself warned. She'll have you roped into a conversation in a skinny minute!<br />
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Being the baby that she is, Abbie is also incredibly cute. She oozes cute! Everything she does is cute (well, almost). From performing made-up dances in the living room to singing worship songs to the top of her lungs to saying the prayer before we eat, the child will melt your heart. And there's not a heart alive that has been melted quite as much as her daddy's heart. Those two are so taken with each other!! The bond they have is really beautiful to watch.<br />
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Sometimes I think about how we almost didn't have an "Abbie"...and it makes my heart ache in a big way. Oh the blessings we would have missed out on!! There was excuse after excuse after excuse for not having a third child, but then someone in ministry made us <b>really</b> stop to think about the root of all of our excuses. Simply put, all of our excuses were purely selfish.<br />
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From day one, our sweet Abigail has taught us surrender in a way we previously hadn't known. She has been a catalyst to giving up control and letting God take the reigns in a greater way. Two children? Well,that felt "do-able", but three has honestly been more than I felt I could handle in my perfectionistic, do-it-all-just-right head...and that's a good thing! My crew keeps me at the feet of Jesus, right where I need to be kept.<br />
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I'm sure the days ahead are faced with more challenges as I try to parent this one who is often a puzzle. However, I am just as positive that there's a ton of love and hugs, lengthy conversations, and utter cuteness around the bend. And you know what? I can't wait to soak in the joy of it all, thanking God each day for the beautiful gift He has given me in my precious, spunky Abigail!<br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>"Children are a heritage from the Lord,</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b> offspring a reward from him."</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Psalm 127:3</b></span></div>
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Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4706887314015666317.post-4207854481298043972013-11-06T10:13:00.000-05:002013-11-07T23:42:36.007-05:00Joy and Pain Working Together<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Just the other day...I traveled home from "The
Cove" in Asheville, NC. I was privileged to experience a few amazing,
quiet days there at our women's retreat. Quiet rarely describes my life. It was
wonderful to have a few days to myself!<o:p></o:p></div>
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Our speaker for part of the weekend was Rebekah Lyons,
author of "Freefall to Fly". What a gracious, beautiful, transparent
story she tells! I found myself identifying with her so much. God has brought
me down similar paths to teach me some of the same faith lessons.<o:p></o:p></div>
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One question Rebekah asked during the weekend has really
stuck with me, and here it is - - <o:p></o:p></div>
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"How have both pain and joy impacted your life?"<o:p></o:p></div>
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The answer in my mind was immediate. I instantly had a picture
pop in my head. It looked something like this...<br />
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It fits with my life and what the Lord has been teaching me
in this season - - that both joy and
pain can coexist, just like the two rails on a railroad track, working
together. In the hands of God, both are used to sculpt, shape, and bless...yes,
bless...our lives.</div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
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Not all pain feels like a blessing, for sure...especially in
the moment it strikes. The trials we go through can be what the enemy meant for
evil. But God? He just keeps on changing those bad situations around, causing
triumph, blessing, joy, wholeness, and spiritual growth beyond measure.<o:p></o:p></div>
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What does it look like to have joy and pain simultaneously
working together? Well, it seems that at the same time I'm witnessing the
metamorphosis of one problem into something of beauty, the revolving door is
bringing about a new issue to tackle, a new crisis to confront. Yet, I'm
learning something rich and deep in the process...<o:p></o:p></div>
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No matter what comes my way, <b>God is my rock. </b><o:p></o:p></div>
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He is the sure foundation that stands through it all. He is
the anchor that holds, though the ship is weary and worn. He's the answer, though
the questions linger. He's the miracle, though the disease rages on. He's the
light at the end, though the tunnel ahead appears long and dark.<o:p></o:p></div>
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If this railroad of life, this one bringing both joy and
pain, has a closer walk with my Lord as its destination, so be it. I'll take
it.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Because, let's be honest, understanding Him intimately and
fully seems to require joining with Him in the fellowship of His suffering.
That's a hard pill to swallow, but let me tell you...I've never known Jesus on
the mountaintop like I've known Him in those moments when it felt like my world
was falling apart.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Head-knowledge becomes heart-knowledge in moments like that.
It's as if you come face-to-face with your own desperation...and if
He doesn't rescue, to whom will you turn? I can't say that in those times God always answers as quickly as I want Him to. Sometimes He purposefully seems to
delay so that I can learn a greater lesson, but I can say this, <u>He always answers</u>! He always comes through. Always.<o:p></o:p></div>
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And thinking about those times my Lord has sat with me in my pain until I was ready to move on...that wrecks me...in the very best way possible! When I am ready, He picks me up, dusts me off, and whispers, "I've got you, baby girl! Keep going." Such moments bring tears of joy that fall like rain, as well as renewed courage to face what's next. In Him, I <b>can</b> keep going.<o:p></o:p></div>
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And so the railroad track continues.<o:p></o:p><br />
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Is the journey easy?<br />
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No.<br />
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Is it worth it?<br />
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A thousand times, yes!!!</div>
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_______________________________<o:p></o:p></div>
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<b>"More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing
that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and
character produces hope, and hope does not disappoint us, because God's love
has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit which has been given to
us."<o:p></o:p></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Romans 5: 3 - 5</span><o:p></o:p></b><br />
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<b><span style="font-size: x-small;">___________________________________</span></b><br />
<b><span style="font-size: x-small;"><br /></span></b>
<b>Linking up at:</b><br />
<b><a href="http://www.missionalwomen.com/">Missional Women</a></b></div>
</div>
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For His glory,<o:p></o:p></div>
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Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4706887314015666317.post-51935457593993504922013-10-25T01:33:00.000-04:002013-10-25T01:33:17.795-04:00Stuff Happens<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
This year, a lot of "stuff" has happened...."stuff" I can't go into right now, but hear me...it has been hard!<br />
<br />
Don't ever even remotely start to think that you have God figured out, because just when you do, He seems to like to change things up.<br />
<br />
That's why I always say, "The Christian life is just one grand adventure!!" Oh, it so is!<br />
<br />
You see, pridefully, before "stuff" started happening this year, I began thinking I had some things figured out in life...not a lot of things...I'm not that naive, but there were some. And then this year happened and well, to be quite honest, I'm just scratching my head at all of it.<br />
<br />
But while I stare blankly at this canvas of life before me, you know what? That still small voice keeps whispering truth and encouragement and love.<br />
<br />
Quite frankly, that's what keeps me in the game. It's what keeps me hope-filled and even, dare I say it - - strong, <b>despite</b> my confusion.<br />
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It's because I know - - I KNOW - - that even though I don't understand it all, I'm resting firmly in the palm of the hand of the One Who does.<br />
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And He has said that nothing can separate me from His love. He has confirmed His grip on me through both His Word and His actions.<br />
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Even when I fear, there is nothing to fear. Even when I doubt, there is nothing to doubt. Even when I blow it big time, there is a second chance waiting on me.<br />
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And the best part is...<br />
<br />
<b>There is a purpose behind it all.</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
God never wastes a trial.<br />
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I might live to the edge of death's door and step over into eternity not understanding any of the things that have happened this past year...or in the other years before it, for that matter. But you know what? I don't have to understand.<br />
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I just have to rest in the fact that God's got me, and He's not going anywhere. This past year has not confused Him or taken Him by surprise. He has a plan.<br />
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And even if "stuff" keeps happening that continues to make me scratch my head and stare blankly at the canvas of life before me, I'll keep trusting...<br />
<br />
and growing stronger, <b>despite</b> my confusion.<br />
<br />
<b>He's got this!</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
I know it.<br />
<br />
<br />
For His glory,</div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4706887314015666317.post-24423657586667065312013-08-21T11:59:00.004-04:002013-08-21T13:55:22.023-04:00Walking In The Answer To Prayer<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Just the other day...I walked out the side door and into the warm breezy air blowing in from the field across the road. Being with my kids 24/7, my walking time was much-needed time! As usual, my thoughts turned to life and the deeper subjects on my heart. I began to talk to the Lord.<br />
<br />
Life in a rural area had been hard on this city-girl, but I had adjusted (if you have heard <a href="http://www.beckyleemeetze.com/p/just-speaking.html">my talk</a>, "Growth in the Shadows", you'll remember what a struggle it had been). While I was content and the Lord had changed my "move-me-now-or-I'm-going-to-die" attitude, there was an ache in my heart for my kids that never truly went away. When my husband and I would reminisce about playing with neighborhood kids as children or having huge birthday parties attended by tons of friends, our kids would just look at us with blank stares. Living off the beaten path, down a long, lonely highway was all they had ever really known.<br />
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Naturally, my heart ached for them to know some of the same joys I had known as a child. Yet, I knew if the Lord asked us to stay in that rural area for our whole lives, then we would do so, happy and peaceful in the center of His will. I needed to talk to God about the ache though.<br />
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I prayed something like this, "God, if it would ever be within Your will, would you let our kids experience a neighborhood...a community...lots of friends...the sort of thing we knew as kids? Would you, Lord, expand our territory and the influence of our family? We love it here, with all of our hearts, but if You want to do more with us, please lead us to the 'more'."<br />
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It wasn't very long after that that my husband got a phone call.<br />
<br />
That phone call lead us to eventually move two and a half hours north...to the "more" that God had prepared for us.<br />
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There are few things about this particular move that have been easy, but I have to tell you...<b>I have never in my life felt so much like I was walking around in the literal, tangible answer to my prayers!!!</b><br />
<br />
When I stand in my den and look out the window to see tons of neighborhood kids playing with my girls in the backyard, I have to fight back the tears. Sometimes I don't even fight them...because letting them flow feels like worship...an overflow of a heart filled to the brim with gratitude. When I take my walks here and neighbors stop their cars to chat, or yell out the window, "Hey Becky!", it makes me thankful for a place where I have found community as well. When friends stay late because "it's peaceful in your house" and kids don't want to leave here, I know it has absolutely nothing to do with me (or us), but everything to do with God...because that, too, is exactly what I prayed for, for this new home to be a place of refuge, peace, and the warmth of His presence.<br />
<br />
So, I'm wondering what it is on your heart today?<br />
<br />
<b>Prayer works.</b> Do you believe it?<b> </b>You should!! Because it does.<br />
<br />
God absolutely hears each and every request you bring to Him. If what you are asking for is within His will, then He <b>delights</b> in giving you exactly what you asked for, plus more blessings on top to that! Why?<br />
<br />
<b><span style="font-size: large;">Because that is the heart of our Father.</span></b><br />
<b><br /></b>
Seek Him. You'll find Him.<br />
<br />
Ask Him. He will answer.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
Linking up at:</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><a href="http://www.w2wministries.org/">Woman to Woman</a></b></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<a href="http://www.raisinghomemakers.com/"><b>Raising Homemakers</b></a></div>
<b><br /></b>
For His glory,</div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4706887314015666317.post-81210721820893848542013-08-13T10:35:00.000-04:002013-08-16T15:15:10.540-04:00Snuggle Time<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Just the other day...my oldest daughter, Sydney, asked me to come and snuggle with her at bedtime. She told me one day, "Mommy, snuggle is sometimes 'code' for...'I really need to talk to you'" This time, "snuggle" was really "code"! But I never know, so...I end up snuggling a lot! :)<br />
<br />
I climbed in bed with my precious girl, slid over next to her, and waited to see what was on her mind. It wasn't long before she started opening up.<br />
<br />
For quite some time now, Sydney has been wanting to learn French. She found an old English to French dictionary I had in high school and, like she does with all books, she devoured it! She wanted more! So, I had started researching some French lessons for this coming school year (quick FYI, we have been homeschooling for over 4 years and absolutely love it). I hadn't yet made a decision on what to order.<br />
<br />
Sometimes delaying is a good thing.<br />
<br />
Sydney slowly, and with much reservation at first, started to let me know that she felt God was putting something big on her heart. My heart swelled at the realization that she was learning to be sensitive to the Holy Spirit!! I wanted to get up and dance around the room...but realizing that might be a little over the top, I bravely fought back tears instead, becoming misty-eyed pretty quickly.<br />
<br />
As she talked on, I began to realize how much of an impact summer camp had had on her. At camp, she and other girls her age were given the opportunity to hear from different missionaries. One particular missionary couple made a strong impression on her. They had been called to serve deaf people and had even learned how to sign in three different languages! This couple had taught the girls how to sign the entire alphabet.<br />
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In the weeks following camp, Sydney went on to tell me that it seemed that she was constantly coming across something having to do with the hard of hearing, whether it was in books, on tv, or in real life. As she recounted the times, I also began to realize how often it was happening. Then she said the words that made me go..."Well, okay then, I guess you need to learn sign language!"<br />
<br />
She said, "Mommy, this is not just something I want to do, but something I feel like ...ya know...I need to do. If I learned French, that would just be for fun, but learning sign language would be for God."<br />
<br />
(Insert big, beaming smile...annnnnd just go ahead and throw in a happy dance, too!)<br />
<br />
I don't care if she ever wins one race, paints one masterpiece, sings like an angel, breaks a world record, or earns a million dollars. <b>I care that she knows how to hear the still, small voice of the Lord and obey it.</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
So, with that said...my nine year old is now whole-heartedly, one-hundred-percent sold out on learning sign language! She has been watching instructional videos on signing over and over, like it is her job. She is wanting me to find books on the subject. I'm looking for someone to teach her (in real life, not on youtube). We're doing this!!<br />
<br />
Because, who am I to say that at the age of nine, my baby girl can't hear the voice of God?<br />
<br />
My husband and I have prayed for her. We have instructed her. We have given her tools. Our job is far from over, of course...yet we are realizing that there comes a time to start actively trusting God that the seeds planted are growing up into full maturity.<br />
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<b>Seeing wings sprout means it's time to start letting them fly.</b><br />
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Spiritually speaking, I pray Sydney learns to soar far beyond anything I could ever imagine for her. May her wings take her exactly where our Father bids...because, just as with all of us, I know that is the place of His greatest blessing (and consequently, her greatest contentment).<br />
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In whatever way He chooses to use it, may her knowledge of sign language and her overwhelming, growing compassion for the hard of hearing, be mightily used<i><b> for His glor</b></i><b><i>y</i></b>.<br />
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_____________________</div>
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<b>"Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity."</b> 1 Tim 4:12<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
Linking up at:</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><a href="http://www.growinghomeblog.com/">Growing Home</a></b><br />
<b><a href="http://www.raisinghomemakers.com/">Raising Homemakers</a></b><br />
<b><a href="http://www.w2wministries.org/">Woman to Woman</a></b><br />
<a href="http://www.missionalwomen.com/faith-filled-friday-blog-link-up.html"><b>Faith Filled Friday</b></a></div>
<br />
With a heart overflowing, </div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4706887314015666317.post-57643445125807142082013-08-09T07:53:00.000-04:002013-08-12T09:48:53.282-04:00Covering the Real You<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Just the other day...I was blessed to be able to go on vacation with some of my extended family. My girls and I stayed in a beach house with my sister-in-law, Laura, her three kids, plus my brother's two girls. More of my family members stayed in a condo nearby. We had a ton of fun together (!), but that's beside the point.<br />
<br />
Shortly after we all arrived, Laura discovered that in the craziness of trying to get out of the house with said kids in tow, she had left a huge bag full of important items, the main items being, her makeup! Just minutes after she had discovered it, she remarked, "I'm going to die without my makeup!"<br />
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To that, my nine year old daughter who was standing nearby matter-of-factly said, "I don't wear makeup and I'm alive."<br />
<br />
She is wise beyond her years...always has been. In that moment, I was proud of her non-conformity...happy that, all-in-all, she remains unaffected by our culture's impossible standards. Perhaps all the talks about inner beauty being most important are sinking in???<br />
<br />
Yet, I cringe, because all talks aside, her present reality is not the world I live in. It's the world I want to live in, but I am a victim of my culture. I live very much in the "I'm-going-to-die-without-my-makeup" world that my sister-in-law and millions of others live in. If I'm going to see anyone besides my immediate family, I want to have makeup on. In fact, my husband-to-be had never seen me without makeup on until the day he proposed (and that was only because I didn't know he was coming over and I was cleaning)! He still went through with the proposal, so I guess that says something, but still, in 7 months of dating, I had never felt comfortable enough to be around him without "covering up". I guess you could say we started out pretty shallow. It takes time to peel back the layers on an onion, but that, too, is beside the point.<br />
<br />
The point is, makeup and wearing makeup is not wrong in and of itself... it's thinking we <b>have</b> to wear it in order to gain value and be beautiful, THAT'S what's wrong!!<br />
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I got a lesson in this when we moved here back in January. The neighborhood we moved into is just awesome. There are friendly, smiling, waving faces everywhere you turn. It's my kind of place:) But, when we first moved in, I wasn't prepared to have people stopping by to meet us all the time. I was in find-a-place-for-all-this-mess-or-I'm-going-to-pull-my-hair-out mode. I literally met every single neighbor within close proximity to our house at a moment when I had not a stitch of makeup on. I know this because I remember the sense of shame I felt each time. I had wanted to make a good impression, not a bad one!<br />
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But you know what? My neighbors met the real me...the me that tries so hard to have it all together, but always fails, overweight, out-of-style, tired-momma me. And, you know what?! They still talk to me! :) They have become friends! We are doing life together! And to think it all started off with my absolute worst foot forward...the "uncovered" me.<br />
<br />
I didn't know it then, but I know it now.<br />
<br />
God has been teaching me a lesson and it is this:<br />
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<b><span style="font-size: large;">Try as we may to cover up, what's real about us always shines through.</span></b><br />
<b><br /></b>
The Word says it so beautifully:<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>"Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious." </b><span style="font-size: x-small;">1 Peter 3:3-4</span><br />
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This passage proves to me that, even in Biblical times, there were women trying to make a good impression, to put their best foot forward. They, too, needed to be reminded about the hidden person of the heart...the real person inside. Ladies, <u>that is the only place our true beauty can be found</u>! The real, uncovered, unpolished, unpowdered, uncut, unlasered, undone you...THAT you holds the potential for the most astonishing, imperishable beauty. By the world's standards, you might not be much to look at, but to God, THAT is the you He is in love with. The real you...the you you are deep down. And the ugliness found there that you run from, He runs towards!! (Amazing, huh?!)<br />
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Listen, God is not impressed when all your pimples are popped and your pores are minuscule. He's not impressed when you are looking all cute in the latest trendy outfit. He's not impressed when your grays are covered, your hair styled, and your nails manicured. His head is not turned by your impressive abs, toned thighs, and uplifted body parts. Does God want you to take care of your body? Yes. Does He want you running yourself ragged to look like the cover of a magazine or even the woman next door? Absolutely not. In doing so, if you're not careful, you make your own culturally-motivated image of perfection your idol.<br />
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Let me tell you what impresses God, sweet sisters. He is impressed when you love Him with all of your heart, soul, mind, and strength (Luke 10:27). He is impressed when you love others like you love yourself (Matt 22:39). He is pleased when you take delight in giving (2 Cor 9:7), do good, and share what you have (Heb 13:16). God's heart swells when you exercise your faith and take Him at His Word (Heb 11:6). Want to turn God's head? If you live righteously, the Word of God literally says that the eyes of the Lord are upon you and His ears are turned towards you (Psalm 34:15). <br />
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I'm ashamed that I have acted so much out of my cultural upbringing, out of this pervading, constant thought that my value comes partly from how good I can look on the outside. I'm ashamed that I have been saying one thing to my daughters about inner beauty, but in actuality living out another. I'm ashamed that the hidden person of the heart has meant less to me, at times, than the outer shell that contains it.<br />
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"Lord, help us, as your daughters, to start waking up to the lies we are consuming. Help us to concentrate on what really matters...on loving You and spending time with You. As we do, would You help us to grow hearts that will follow steadfastly after You, no matter which way the currents of our culture flow? Please do 'heart surgery' on us daily, removing those things that bear no weight in Your kingdom. Help us, Father, to remove any graven images we have in our minds. And help us, Lord, to diligently teach those who are coming behind us where their true value is found<b>...only in You."</b><br />
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<div style="text-align: center;">
Linking up at:</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><a href="http://www.missionalwomen.com/">Faith Filled Friday</a></b><br />
<a href="http://proverbs14verse1.blogspot.com/2013/08/wise-woman-linkup.html"><b>Wise Woman Link Up</b></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><a href="http://raisinghomemakers.com/2013/homemaking-link-up-134/">Raising Homemakers</a></b><br />
<a href="http://www.thebettermom.com/"><b>The Better Mom</b></a></div>
<br />
For His glory,
</div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4706887314015666317.post-89154548367321087802013-07-25T09:55:00.000-04:002013-07-25T09:55:31.414-04:00Laboring in Vain and Beating Myself Up<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<b>Strive </b>- <i>Verb</i>. 1. make great efforts to achieve or obtain something 2. struggle or fight<br />
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I strive...a lot. A LOT.<br />
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I wear myself out!<br />
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I am the youngest sibling in my family...seven years younger than my older sister, actually. While you may think that makes me the "baby" and also an "accident", you're wrong on both accounts...well, kinda;) My mom prayed to have precisely 2 boys and 2 girls and didn't give up until God answered. No accident here, thank you very much! :) Also, according to "The Birth Order Book" I had to read in college, while I'm technically the "baby" of my family, I don't really act like the baby since my closest sibling is so much older than me. Nope, I'm more like an only child.<br />
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So there you have it.<br />
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As an "only child", I'm an overachiever by my very nature.<br />
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And I hate it.<br />
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<a href="http://www.womenofembrace.com/1/post/2013/07/laboring-in-vain-and-beating-myself-up.html">CONTINUE READING BY CLICKING HERE</a><br />
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For His glory,</div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4706887314015666317.post-46879678409689023382013-07-10T10:30:00.001-04:002013-07-10T10:30:49.459-04:00Waiting is a Test<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Waiting on God is hard work, especially when it's a long one. If you want to know how strong your faith is, examine the things you do during a season of waiting on an answer from the Lord. Your true colors will shine through. It can be as if two worlds collide...one full of faith and confidence, the other riddled with fear and doubt. During a period of waiting, certainly, almost without thinking, you make a choice about which camp you're going to dwell in...fear or faith.<br />
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I've faced some pretty long waits in my life. During many of them, I have waivered dramatically. Allow me tell you about two of them...<br />
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<a href="http://www.womenofembrace.com/1/post/2013/07/waiting-is-a-test.html">CONTINUE READING BY CLICKING HERE</a></div>
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For His glory, </div>
</div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4706887314015666317.post-55792899520891036432013-05-12T01:47:00.000-04:002013-05-13T00:29:15.723-04:00The Gift of You, Mom (A Letter)<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-71u3FeydQtI/UY8o8a-dwOI/AAAAAAAAAiY/P4iFaOjcyLw/s1600/forblog1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="291" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-71u3FeydQtI/UY8o8a-dwOI/AAAAAAAAAiY/P4iFaOjcyLw/s320/forblog1.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My mom and dad, admiring grandchild #10</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<b>An open letter to my precious mother. She is my gift from above....</b></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Mom,</span><br />
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It's hard to put into words the overwhelming thankfulness I feel for getting to have a mother like you. I've written posts here for a few years now, and with each passing Mother's Day, I think "next year I'll write about Mom", because honestly trying to wrap up my thoughts about you on the page is like trying to capture a hurricane. Whatever this letter becomes, it can't do you, or the job you've done, any justice...but as intimidating as the task may be, I will try. And just in case you're wondering, the tears are already trickling down. Funny, that reminds me of someone else I know! :)<br />
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When I was a little girl, I remember being your constant companion. I'd tag along for very loooong trips to the grocery store, riding in the bottom of the cart as you looked through coupon after coupon. You were the "coupon lady" long before couponing was cool! I can still hear you telling Daddy how much you saved when you got home. We vacationed twice a year most years, all because of the time you spent to save, save, save!<br />
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Then there were those other stops around town, paying bills, getting gas, and stopping by the bank. My favorite errand was going by Dad's work to pick up his check...running up those huge steps while you waited for me in the car. I felt so independent and grown-up going all by myself!<br />
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There were those days you took me shopping. Oh my, how we would have the best time strolling in and out of stores, searching for good deals and just the right outfit! Inevitably, I would get my heart set on something a little too expensive, but you'd give in because it made you happy to see me so excited.<br />
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Whatever we did, we had lots of fun together!<br />
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Some of the most special time I spent with you though, was in the car, either on the way to school or on the way back home. We would talk the entire time and ended up having many deep and meaningful conversations. Day after day after day, you poured into me...always, without fail, pointing me to the Lord. Your answers to my many questions were Biblical, wise, and never steered me wrong.<br />
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Deuteronomy 6:6-9 says to impress the Lord's commands on your children when you sit at home or walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.....you did exactly that. You obeyed God's command. You did well!!! And you continue to "mother" me with your amazing advice even today.<br />
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You are a rock, Mom. So wise. So steady. So unwavering and strong.<br />
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But you know what amazes me about you...as strong as you are, you are also extremely tender, caring, and gentle. If your strength could reach the highest mountain peaks, it's your love that would soar above the stars!<br />
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I have been blessed to know endless, boundless, limitless love because of you, Mom. When anyone talks about sacrificial love, I always think of Jesus...and you. In a thousand different ways, big and small, you have laid down your hopes and your dreams to see the hopes and dreams of your four children fulfilled. You have given and given and given of yourself, investing in us and never asking for a return.<br />
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There is a generation of faithfulness being raised up behind you, and that can only happen because you have led the way. You have blazed a trail of strength and honor, gentleness and love, self-sacrifice and faithful obedience. Your children are following you. Our children are following us. Generations to come will follow in your footsteps.<br />
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There had to have been times in the past when you questioned, as all mothers do, "Am I doing okay or am I just messing things up?" I can only imagine the joy in your heart that comes from seeing the fruit of your labor and the answers to those many tearful prayers. It's funny, when I was young, I would sometimes think, "Don't let Mom pray, or we will be here for a while!" Now, I know the value of those prayers, that they were prayers full of faith. You would pray over a meal and end up with tears streaming down your face, so I knew what would happen in your time alone with God. You would reach heaven and touch the heart of the Father, that's what would happen! I know it still does...and I am but one of the many beneficiaries of those prayers.<br />
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Thank you, Mom, for the late nights, the meals, the laundry, the back rubs, the shopping trips, the band aids, the school trips, the rides to and from whatever I was into, the talks, the laughter, the tears, the prayers, the hugs, the kisses, the discipline, the protectiveness, the advice, the caring, the gentleness, the long phone conversations, and most of all...the love.<br />
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You have said it many times, that I am your gift...but know this, Mom, you have been more of a gift to me than I could have ever dreamed! Long after you leave this place, I will be opening up the gift of you...still discovering the mysteries of all you have instilled in my life. Each season brings a new understanding of you, and each season I uncover a deeper appreciation of the woman you are.<br />
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I love you, Mom, with all my heart.<br />
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Thank you<i>...for everything.</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Linking up at:</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<a href="http://www.thebettermom.com/"><b>The Better Mom</b></a></div>
<br /></div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14001840414260780629noreply@blogger.com